Super Scary (and Sexist) Halloween Costumes

When I was little, I’d play dress up. I’d put on my mother’s beige heels or my sister’s prom dress and strut around my room like it was a runway.

I’d wear a pink tutu and make a crown out of yellow construction paper and draw little jewels with magenta and green crayons.

I could spend hours and hours just frolicking around my room; trying on this shirt or pretending to be that Disney princess.

Even though my dress up days have passed, there is still one occasion where I can relive one of my favorite elementary school pastimes.

Halloween – It’s the day where the ghosts, ghouls, and zombies come out to play. Where you can be whoever you want to be, without judgement. It’s a time to live in a fantasy for a day.

When I was little I’d jump for joy knowing I could wear my princess or witch costume to school, and the incoming candy overstock I’d have after trick-or-treating.

Now that I’m older, I’m just excited for the excuse to dress up for a day. I’ve noticed that it’s becoming harder and harder to find a costume I like, and for one big reason: women’s Halloween costumes are hypersexualized.

Now, this may not come as a surprise to some of you. You’ve been through the struggle of picking out a costume. Whether it be you couldn’t choose just what you wanted to be or you couldn’t find the perfect costume for who you wanted to be.

For women, finding an appropriate costume takes another ounce of effort. I’ve found that once you grow out of child sizes and into teenage or adult sizes, that the dresses don’t really grow much longer.

If you go onto any major costume store, such as Party City, you can see just how true this is. There are very few costumes for women that don’t contain one of the following: little tutus, corsets, skin-tight body suits, or above mid-thigh skirts.

Now, some women like wearing these costumes, and I see nothing wrong with that. But, the problem is for the women who don’t want to show much skin on Halloween.

Bustle, an online news blog, did an article about the difference between men’s and women’s costumes, which you can see here: http://www.bustle.com/articles/7907-15-mens-and-womens-halloween-costumes-reveal-some-scary-sexism .

They bring an air of comedy to just how sexualized women’s costumes can be. For example, a man’s costume for an owl is a full-body suit while a woman’s costume is a short dress with little feathers all over it.

And that’s not even the worst of them.

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The problem with this inherent sexism is that it gives women boundaries for this fun holiday. If a woman isn’t particularly confident in her body, or doesn’t want to show it off, then her costumes are very, very limited.

Even teenage girl’s costumes are becoming more and more skimpy. In fact, most costumes that would fit me I can’t even wear to school, because they don’t follow school dress code.

Some would say that it would be easier just to make a costume at home, but why should I, and many other women, have to?

Instead of telling me what I should do to help my costume-less state, tell manufacturers to create more women’s costumes that are less provocative.

A Big, Calming Hug

It happens in an instant,

the moment they become distant.

Each memory merely a snapshot,

frozen in your mind.

Smile for the picture,

a big, calming hug goodbye,

no more little tears left to cry.

Now there are only real tears,

the ones that come from your biggest fears,

the ones that leave you empty,

a body heaving for air,

for love,

for a nice, calming hug.

No.

There are no more reassuring words,

from the one that makes your whole world.

No more smiles as you bite into your freshly baked cookie,

no more cheers on the soccer field,

no more hugs when you’re sad,

no more hugs when you’re glad,

no more,

no more.

Is it nice to miss class when you want?

Is it nice to get “mental health days?”

WHAT THE HECK.

It is NOT nice to have to miss class to see a therapist,

to talk about “feelings” and ways to help your crippling anxiety,

when missing class causes even more stress,

then being there.

It is NOT nice to stay in bed gasping for air,

tears everywhere,

in your hair,

eyes,

pillow,

sheets.

It is NOT nice to lose a parent to cancer.

It is NOT nice to hear your condolences.

Don’t think of yourself as a hero for saying “sorry.”

Don’t fling around a word you don’t mean.

Don’t tell me you know how I’m feeling.

JUST LEAVE.

I don’t want a hug,

not from you.

I only want a big, calming hug.

If only I had the person here to give it to me.null

Sorry, We’re Not Sorry

“Sorry.” This word has become slightly controversial in recent years. Most know that it is used to patch up a broken relationship, acknowledge an everyday wrongdoing, and to make up for committing a personal offense.

Who tends use this word the most? Women. If you don’t think so, then you might as well apologize to CNN, NY Times, Time, and Forbes for wasting their time writing about it.

Many reporters go to the same two studies: one made on 33 college students who kept an online 12-day diary reporting every time they apologized and why.

The second was another college study, this time with 120 of them, rating how offensive a particular action is, such as bumping into someone or asking a question.

These studies found a few interesting ideas. Women, in fact, do apologize more, but men and women alike apologize the same amount they think they offend someone. Interestingly enough, the divide isn’t the amount of apologies, but the significance of the wrong-doing.

“Men aren’t actively resisting apologizing because they think it will make them appear weak or because they don’t want to take responsibility for their actions,” said study researcher Karina Schumann, a doctoral student in social psychology at the University of Waterloo in Ontario, Canada. “It seems to be that when they think they’ve done something wrong they do apologize just as frequently as when women think they’ve done something wrong. It’s just that they think they’ve done fewer things wrong.” (Live Science)

Women perceive being polite differently than men. Whether it be taking up space, or asking a question during discussion. After seeing a popular ad from Pantene, I realized how much I say it. Take a look:

The ad shows how much women apologize for things they don’t need to apologize for.

This ad is critiquing that women need to feel sorry for asserting themselves, taking up space, or receiving help.

Many women should realize that being polite doesn’t mean you have to be submissive or allow others to walk all over you.

Now I’m not saying to just walk around in your everyday life bumping into people or stepping on their feet and not apologizing, I’m simply saying women don’t need to feel bad for existing.

Women aren’t burdens to society, so don’t apologize for existing, girls.

Photo Credit to: http://www.abhmuseum.org