Girlhood

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Being a girl is an experience that words cannot capture, no matter how hard we try. There is a sense of connection that every woman feels with each other; we all know what it’s like to experience your period for the first time, what it’s like to have to go bra shopping for the first time, and we all know what it’s like to look over our shoulders when walking alone. Like many, if not almost all, women, I remember my first time looking over my shoulder and feeling an instant adrenaline rush telling me to run. I was 10 years old, walking to the Walgreens two streets over from my house to go grab snacks on a hot summer day. I was wearing black Nike shorts and an oversized Miami Dolphins t-shirt. A man driving in his car up the road I was going down slowed when he saw me, and he instantly turned around and started following me. My heart sank to my feet, and my whole body went cold. I was only a child, but I had this immediate response, almost as if it had been ingrained into my DNA, telling me to run, and I did. I ran as fast as my body physically could home, and when I got into my house, I sprinted up to my room and didn’t come out for hours. I didn’t walk to that Walgreens for 3 years after that due to the fact that I was so terrified. This may sound like some unique experience, but it is a common one for women to experience even at that young age. Being a girl means having to assess your surroundings wherever you go to ensure you are safe or at least know how to get out. Being a girl means going everywhere with someone else to make sure you are never alone. Being a girl means knowing to cover your drink and only taking closed cans when you are out. Girlhood is the feeling of experiencing universal experiences with women you may never meet; girlhood is knowing what it’s like to look over your shoulder wherever you go, a feeling every woman who has ever lived can relate to.

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Colombia Missions Trip

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Over the summer, I went on a mission trip to Pereira, Colombia, to help at a children’s orphanage. Every kid who is at the orphanage has a story and a reason they’re there. Some of the kids were very shy and would barely talk to us, and others just wanted attention and someone who cares about them. Even though my Spanish was really bad, I could still have small conversations with the kids, but they would get annoyed because most of the time I had no clue what they were saying. Some of the kids were my age, and it was crazy to see how different our lives are and how happy they are just because a group of Americans who couldn’t even speak Spanish came to hang out with them. Over the week and a half, we gave them multiple gifts; some of the gifts were things that they needed, but others were toys and games. After we left, there was a huge earthquake only a few towns over, and some of the orphanages building got destroyed, but even though they didn’t have much space and they already had trouble getting food, they still decided to take in more kids whose parents were lost in the earthquake. Going to Colombia was such a cool experience, and I cant wait to go again next summer. 

Redemption Ojai | Ojai CA

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Changing Perspectives

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It’s crazy to me how fast your perspective on life can change. Over the last four months, I feel like I have learned so much about myself and the world around me. I was always the type of person who felt like they needed someone, whether romantically or platonically. I would always complain about not having a boyfriend or feeling alone, but I came to realize that being alone is ok, infact it is normal. How can you be with someone else, whether a friendship or relationship, if you don’t fully understand yourself and are confident being alone? Over the past few months, I’ve grown to spend that time alone and enjoy it. Especially when driving alone, having that moment singing your favorite song on your playlist while zoning out on the road is such a freeing feeling. You lose your sense of worries and pressures; no one to put energy into but yourself. I learned to realize that while I love being with my friends, it’s ok to have those moments alone. I haven’t found myself feeling that loneliness much anymore or saying how I need a boyfriend because I don’t. I think that I used to say all those things because I felt so behind everyone. But truly, I wasn’t; everything happens at the right time for their person, and there’s no rushing that or even a need to. Being “behind” in your firsts as a teenager can feel so degrading, but really it doesn’t matter. No one should look at you or treat you differently because it doesn’t matter; it isn’t something that should define you. So yes, even though I don’t feel that “behind” feeling anymore, I learned to realize I never was, and all of that stuff shouldn’t define you. All of us humans are worth so much more because of who we are, not what we have done. 

Silhouette Man Sitting Alone On Beach Stock Footage Video (100% Royalty-free) 1022546908 | Shutterstock
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Independent sport

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Switching from a school sport to independent PE has honestly made my life so much easier. I started doing independent Lagree, and I didn’t realize how much time a school sport was taking up until I wasn’t doing one anymore. I used to have practices after all of my classes, which for me meant getting home later, having less time for homework, and basically having my whole afternoon planned around my sport. Now, I have way more freedom with my schedule.

The biggest difference is definitely how much free time I have every day. Instead of going straight from ending classes to school sports for 2 hours, I can go home, get ready for Lagree, hang out with my friends, do homework, and still have time to do nothing for once. I don’t have to worry about rushing through everything because I know I have a certain time for my workout class. I can actually go to school without having to worry if I have a game after school that also requires me to leave early and miss class time. I also like that my independent sport is actually a workout that I know is good for me.

I also like being able to choose when I work out. With Lagree, I can schedule classes in advance instead of having my schedule built around my school sports. If I have a lot of homework that day, I can just plan around that, and if I have plans after school, I can go to a different class; it’s just a lot more convenient. I always hear people on sports teams talking about how late they got home, and it makes me so glad I’m not doing that anymore.

Home - Reform Room Lagree

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Documentaries

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As a kid, if you asked me whether I would rather watch SpongeBob or a documentary on ancient civilizations, unlike most children, I would have said the documentary. I loved documentaries as a kid, specifically on ancient history or endangered animals. I can’t exactly explain why; I guess I liked to learn, along with the fact that I had a probably unhealthy obsession with ancient Egypt for an 8-year-old. I still, to this day, could tell you the step-by-step process for mummification as well as the amazing technology they had for their time. I could probably also still recall the reasons that the Northern White Rhino is critically endangered, or how whales evolved. Part of me wishes I still had this same urge to learn as I did when I was a kid. It’s not that I don’t like learning now, but it all feels too rehearsed and processed; it’s like it’s only taught to us to give us a grade and move us to the next level of the school system, and not because they want us to actually be entertained and invested. I hope one day I want to learn the same way I did when I was a kid, when I believed I could be anything and do anything.

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Friends in College

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Val is living her best life. Val is studying abroad in Paris and traveling to different countries every other weekend. Val couldn’t be more excited to go to her dream college in the second semester. But I miss Val. I miss hanging out with her every day after school, going to Pilates, getting lobster rolls in Malibu, and going to watch the sunset at Lake Casitas until it’s so late our moms are calling us. I miss all of the fun adventures she would surprise me with, always having something to look forward to. I miss lying in Val’s room giggling with her about dumb TikToks, or having dinner at her house almost every night to the point where her family felt like my family.

Writing this blog makes me emotional because I’ve never experienced one of my best friends leaving and starting a whole new life, knowing nothing will ever be the same. I love my friends; they distract me from thinking about it, but it’s on those late-night drives home where I put on music we used to listen to and just burst into tears. Sometimes I feel like I’m being too dramatic about it but I really miss Val.

I feel like she has helped shape the person I am today. I do not know what I would do if I had never met Val. We’ve had our ups and downs like every other friendship, but we’ve always gotten through them positively. Right now, it’s hard to stay in contact with her because of the time change in Paris. But I still know that even if we don’t talk everyday the minute we see each other in person, everything will still feel the same.

“Friends Hugging” by Helena Lopes/ CC0 1.0

Goodbye Summer

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I never felt like I would miss summer this much. I was always the type of person who would be excited to start school again, just to see my friends, of course, but this year was different. I’m going into my final year, and I just have never wanted to be done more. I feel like I’ve grown out of this point in life and that I’m ready for that step forward: college. I finally got my license this summer, which allowed me to do so many things I never could have thought I would do before. I spent endless days with my friends laughing and making memories I’ll never forget. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate school, but I just wish I could have those 3 months back. That freedom of not having homework every night and having last-minute plans to go anywhere and do anything. I want to be back in Hawaii, Yosemite, re-live Girls State, Disney, and even just be on the beach again. I felt I finally got the opportunity to live my life without most of the restraints from my parents. I’ll forever remember the summer before my senior year and never forget the people and experiences that made it so special. So, even though I have to say goodbye, I hope that once it rolls back around again next year, it will be just as amazing.

Ventura County Beaches – Coastal Living & Local Guide | Realty ONE Group Summit
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All School Camping

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This year, for my all school camping trip me and a few other students went to Santa Cruz Island. I was not exited to go one this trip, in reality I’m never very exited to go on camping trips. I also am not a fan of boat rides because I get a little sea sick so I was not looking forward to the trip. I still went because I would rather go on that trip than any other one. We got to the island and it started raining after a few hours of being there. We hadn’t set up camp yet so we all had to do it in the rain. The second day we went on a hike and then got to hang out in the water the rest of the day, it was nice. The rest of the trip consisted of us all hanging out in the water, snorkeling, sea kayaking, and jumping off the pier. I would say that it was definitely one of my favorite trips I’ve been on with school, even though I wasn’t exited about it in the beginning.

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TikTok AI Fruit Videos

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P.C – Google “TikTok Fruit video”

Like every normal person, I would like to doomscroll on TikTok, but every once in a while, I just have to see those AI fruit videos. I have no interest in watching them, but it just comes up every single time I open that app.

I don’t care about the strawberry and banana and their relationship drama; I just want to doomscroll in peace, and I see no crime in that. 

I have said not interested so many times when they come up, but it doesn’t matter; those AI fruit videos just keep swarming my For You page. I’ve reported it one time, and literally the next thing on my For You page is the same video, but the part two version.

Now I must admit I have watched a few of them when they came up, and sure, I had a little giggle, but that is no excuse for it to come back five times in a row. 

Now I can’t show people my For You page because it’s just so embarrassing when it comes up.  Fix your app, TikTok    

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French Toast Everyday

frenchfriesssssLeave a comment

For breakfast, lunch, and dinner, all I eat is school food. Eating school food isn’t exciting anymore because it’s all the same boring, repetitive food. 

I feel like at some point the food served should be mixed up. For example, why is Monday always French toast and Wednesday always waffles? At some point, eating the same food on the same day every day gets boring, and it sucks out the fun of eating breakfast entirely. Maybe if every Monday wasn’t French toast, I would make the effort to get out of bed and be happy, but it’s not.

One of these days I’ll stop going to breakfast entirely and just eat some snacks in my room for breakfast because, honestly, that’s better than French toast. I’m not asking for an entirely new breakfast food; I’m just asking for Mondays not to be French toast. I would gladly have pancakes on Monday instead of French toast for breakfast.   

Delicious French Toast Sticks for School Lunch

P.C – Google “School French Toast”