Hello and welcome back to Emanuel’s blogs. One hundred and fifty words of free thought so that he doesn’t get zeros on them. He being me, I am he, there is only me. Anyway, I love garage sales, it’s like modern-day exploring. Today I got a carabiner watch and a point-and-shoot camera. The camera is a Canon Powershot SD600 I like the way it looks and feels in my hand. It has a tiny viewfinder which I think is cool. I don’t have a charger for it but Ben does so I’ll go over to his house after work and pick that up probably.
I’m so done with school, I know this is a fairly universal feeling for seniors in their last month of Highschool but holy moly it’s getting to be a lot. Something about listening to the junior talk about college as if it’s the most important thing ever really bothers me. Like why are they so keen to change who they are to fit into a school, every single one of them is incredibly smart and industrious and interesting but for some reason they have this competitive, verging on toxic, view of the college process. Like if they would just be themselves they would probably do better than when they all freak out about how to curate the application to a school.
I’m very excited to be back in my element this weekend. Me originally being from the ghetto, hood, mud, etc. It can be rough for the realest person from these types of areas to come up to communities such as these and fit in. However, spring break has allowed me to return to the hood and have fun. I will also be able to see one of my favorite rappers this weekend, he goes by the name R3dachilliman. He’s made songs like Blamp Camp, Woc Pint Freestyle, and Ice. Im planning on taking my friends from the suburbs to let them see what a real party is like. However, it can be dangerous at these parties so you need to act right and be in check, therefore I will be putting my friends in training the day before. This training will consist of how to act if someone comes up to you and says “Where you from”, or if someone yells at you from across the street “Lemme holla at you real quick!” These will just be a few of the things I will be training them for, but it will be fun!
Today, I am having an off day. I know it when I wake up because I start my day with a sigh rather than a smile. I don’t bother to make myself feel good by putting on some mascara and emphasizing the pink on my cheeks, I let my eye bags express the weight falling on my head. I put on my Uggs, and I always wear Uggs on my off days. they remind me of my childhood and the ability to cheer myself up simply by the embrace of my mother. It takes more now, a walk or a bath won’t fix it. It sits deep within the structure of my body. It sheathes across all of my nerve endings, running through every square inch of me. It is not sad, nor is it happy, it just is. The feeling of simply not feeling it strangely comforting to me. It is not dark or sad, it is normal. It is okay to sit and let your mind drift into space. It is okay to sit on the floor of the shower and let the water trickle down your face and across your lips. It is okay to put on a show and not pay attention. It is okay to go for a walk and find yourself sitting on the icy pavement within 5 minutes. It’s okay to keep your headphones in all day and let your world be surrounded by something that you chose. I don’t know who needs to hear it, but it is okay. I often forget that this is not being lazy, unmotivated, or worthless. It is normal. Everyone has days where the air seems a little thicker and the light feels a little dim. Whether you choose to admit it or not is a choice, I do, because I want people to know that despite my sarcastic sense of humor and plastered smile, I too have off days. It’s really hard to see the bright side sometimes because maybe there just isn’t one. I mean sure, someone always has it worse, and hey, at least I’m alive. Believe me, I’m grateful, but for the love of god let me feel something. Anything.
Fall has got to be my favorite season. Winter means Christmas and lit fireplaces, but the weather gets to be a little miserable after a while. Spring is a close second, but blooming flowers = allergies. Summer is obviously great because there’s time to relax, but here in Ojai we’re forced to spend the day inside in order to escape the sweltering heat. Nothing really competes with autumn.
It is the golden light, crunchy leaves, steaming chai and pumpkin bread that make me fall in love with this season again and again each year. Not to mention scented candles, long showers, cinnamon, football games and Gilmore girls. There’s a perfect balance between the lingering sunshine and cool, crisp breeze. Halloween means candies and costumes and parties; Thanksgiving brings with it cranberry sauce and family time and TV. Beyond festivities, I like to read books, listen to music, see friends, go thrifting and on afternoon bike rides in the meadow – all of which just feel special at this time of year.
And don’t even get me started on clothing. I won’t freeze to death if I wear a skirt or tank top, and neither will I drown in sweat if I opt for a knit cardigan or turtleneck. Plus, I recently got a pair of Doc Marten’s for my birthday, and though they weigh an obscene amount, I love them with all my heart. (They also make me another 2 inches taller, which is nothing to complain about).
All in all, autumn is without doubt the best season, and I’m looking forward to these next couple of months.
Today it was 86 degrees. This weather is so gorgeous it makes me sick. When I wake up and the sun is shining through my window, I want nothing more than to let my bed swallow me whole until nine pm the same day. I think that it’s so ironic how such a beautiful day could make me want to hide in my room for so long. When I sit in class and look out the window as the heat ripples across the ground, I want to cry and bang my head against the desk. I. Hate. It. I like to put in my left airpod and listen to the same playlist over and over again all day. It mainly consists of Dream, Ivory, Oscar Lang, Deftones, The Walters, and Cocteau Twins. If you were to look it up, it sounds like the feeling of taking a bath at three in the morning in the dark, because that is my comfort. I love to be alone. But not in a sad, I’m so depressed because my life is just the hardest thing in the world kind of way. I like it because it reminds me that every day is the same, and I hate that feeling but in a weird way I love to feel the things that I hate. I love routines. I love when it’s cold outside but I’m wearing two shirts and a hoodie. When you wake up and the sky is grey, you can’t see 50 feet in front of you because of the haze. I love to walk alone at school and wait for the day to end. It’s the same feeling every day that I crave. I love to hate being sad.
Seasonal depression is wild. I’m not a depressed person, don’t really have reason to be depressed, and have never been depressed, but this winter I was feeling kinda sad I’m not even gonna front. Since the start of December, I had a fog hanging over me. I lost my drive to seek new relationships and became content with what I had, which was a good thing in some aspects, but I was incredibly unmotivated. I was bogged down by hours of college work, AP classes, soccer practices, and late nights during the school week. On the weekend, I would drive down to LA and it would feel like I had to choose between my family and friends when spending time with people. I was in the pit of despair.
All of the sudden, I have snapped out of it. I have moved past soccer, college apps, and have embraced senioritis. This has given me time to meditate during the school week and afforded me much more clarity. I have also started sleeping in LA on Sunday nights, which gives me more time to balance hanging with family and friends. Also, my convertible whose clutch I totally melted a month ago is back from the shop so I can take friends out in it. ALSO, I have a new friend who is the perfect candidate for a cruise in the Boxster.
Everything is coming up, Alden. I don’t know how things just magically turned around, but I’m here to ride out this wave of good energy.
This month is the season for seniors to apply to college if they want to apply for Early Action (EA) or Early Decision (ED). In fact, I was planning to apply to Early action, but everything wasn’t going the way I want to be. My plan was to finish all the essays for every college one day before the deadline. The deadline is closer than it appears. I always thought I have time, so I do a little every day and sometimes I don’t even do it. Without a doubt, I couldn’t finish it and doesn’t have enough time to send it to my counselor and correct it. Two days left before the EA deadline! I just can’t believe how fast the deadline has shown up. I spent two nights burning the midnight oil, trying to finish it all. Of course, I still can’t finish the application, and I have to give up on EA for this time.
Yes, I took my lesson, I should be taking this seriously. Once it passes the deadline, there is no way back to regret it. I started to feel the “Real” stress from college applications. “College deadlines are no joke.” My college counselor always tells me that, and now I understand that it’s really not a joke.
I really, really love opossums. They’re smart, unique, friendly, and adorable. Here’s some cool facts about them.
They are the only marsupial that isn’t native to Australia.
Opossums are marsupials, which means they’re a subspecies of mammal that carry their embryo out to term in a pouch on their belly. The most commonly known marsupial is probably the kangaroo. Opossums aren’t much like kangaroos, but they also carry their joeys – a litter of which can contain up to 20 babies – in a pouch and then on their back until the joeys are ready to live by themselves.
There are several species of opossums, all of which are native to the Americas. They range all the way from South America to Canada.
Much like apes, humans, raccoons, and some other species of animals, opossums have opposable thumbs. This means they have a fifth finger on the side of their paw that allows them to grasp objects and handle them in a way most that other animals can’t. Opossums usually don’t use this advantage for evil, though. Raccoons, on the other hand (pun not intended), will use their opposable thumbs to get into storage bins, to open trash cans, to unscrew lids of containers, to open doors, and other nefarious things. Opossums are much kinder than raccoons. Plus, it’s unbelievable cute when they hold things in their tiny hands.
Prehensile tails are a trademark feature of monkeys, but opossums have them too. They use their tails to hold onto thin surfaces better, to climb, to hang from branches, and to balance them as they walk. Their tails look a lot like the tails of rats, but there are muscles in their tails that allow them to use them much better than rats can. I, personally, think that their crusty, scaly tails are super cute.
They are omnivores, but don’t hunt mammals(except for mice).
Opossums are omnivores, which means they eat meat and plants. However, unlike most meat-eating animals, they don’t hunt almost any live mammals as their prey. Opossums usually scavenge food from unlocked dumpsters, left out pet food, or road kill. The only live prey that they consume are worms, bugs, mice, and sometimes smaller birds or snakes. If they are really starving, they might go after a larger target like a chicken, but this is very uncommon.
“Playing possum” is a popular expression for pretending to be dead or asleep. Opossums have an flight instinct that causes them to fall to the ground, loll their tongue, un-focus their eyes, and pretend to have died when confronted by predators that they can’t easily escape. They won’t get up even if they’re jostled around. It’s pretty cute. To humans, it just looks like the opossum is having the best nap of its life.
They like to play dress-up.
This fact isn’t scientifically verified, but look at these guys! They sure do look like they’re having fun. They look adorable, too. So stylish.
Sometimes opossums look like they just tripped and fell in front of the popular kids and the popular kids all saw their Paw Patrol lunchbox fall out of their backpack. It’s like my favorite thing. Look at this little guy.
(Photo credit to @gladysopossum on Instagram)
All in all, opossums are pretty cool little animals. If you see one near your house, don’t bother it or hurt it. They’re non-threatening creatures and it’s just living its life. If you can legally rehabilitate opossums or care for disabled ones as pets, definitely do. They’re sweet little guys. I love them so much.
Many people dislike or even hate eggplant, but I think eggplant is good when cooked right. And the dish that I think is cooked correctly is the eggplant casserole that my grama makes.
Gretchen Schuette, my grandma, wrote down her mom’s eggplant casserole and it is delicious. It is the perfect balance of eggplant and tomato. The grated cheese on top is the perfect way to finish the dish.
Ingredients:
1 medium-size eggplant
3 tbsp. butter
3 tbsp. flour
1 can tomatoes or 2 cups of fresh tomatoes
1 chopped small green pepper
1 small onion, chopped
1 tsp. salt
1 tbsp. brown sugar
Grated cheese
photo credit: Medical News today
Recipe:
Dice eggplant and cook for 10 minutes in boiling water.
In another pan, melt butter and blend with flour.
(Cook on low heat for 3 minutes if you use whole wheat flour.)
Add the rest of the ingredients (except eggplant).
Cook sauce for 5 minutes.
Mix together the sauce and the eggplant and put in a casserole.
Cover with grated cheese and bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes.
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