In the past few weeks, I’ve had an overwhelming feeling of nostalgia. I haven’t fully come to terms with the fact that I will be going to college and changing my entire life in less than a year. Everything I’ve grown up with and experienced my entire life is about to be turned around. I feel nostalgic towards the past three years here. All of my funny memories with my best friends. Having sleepovers every night, laughing until we cry. While I feel so sad about having to leave all that, there is nothing I’m more excited about than moving on with my life. I feel like I’ve gotten to a point where I am ready to figure out my future career and a new life. I can’t wait to move away and get away from stupid, immature, petty high school drama. There is nothing more draining than dealing with some stupid drama every few weeks. I hope that in college, that stops happening because it’s actually so unbearable. I am excited for the future, but I will miss everything I will leave behind.
My grades right now are not an accurate representation of who I want to be as a student. My APES grade is not good at all. That test that everyone in my class took was so confusing. Other than APES, my grades aren’t terrible, a couple of A’s, some B’s, but I wish they were all A’s. College is not as far as it was last year, and I really need to start doing better if I even want a chance at getting into a good college. Not only is there stuff inside of school, but there’s stuff outside of school as well. I really need to spend more time focusing on school than worrying about other things. The annoying part is that there is no opportunity for me to even improve my grade in APES because the only things that change it are the tests. So, moving forward, I really, really, really need to study and focus because this path I’m headed down is not a good one.
When the day comes for me finally to receive my diploma, I won’t know if my life is ending, or just beginning.
I use to struggle trying to imagine a life after high school; college was always just a fantasy.
I remember when my brother applied to college, when he moved in, and then finally when he graduated. It was inspiring, and made me eager, but it never felt like an experience I was going to be able to touch.
Even though, a year from now i’ll be sitting in a dorm room at some mystery school, it still feels like something so far away. It’s scary how fast it’s coming; how little time we have left with the freedom of high school responsibilities.
I would like to think that going to college is the beginning of a whole new chapter, something new, fresh, and exciting. Graduating college on the other hand, now that’s the end of my life. I mean, i’m going to be an adult in just a couple months, but you once you are out of college, thats like real adult life, something i’m not excited for. Who am I if not a teenager girl?
This weekend I toured a school that was never at the top of my list, but after visiting, became the center of my target. Loyola Marymount University (LMU) was exceptional, and honestly, there was nothing I didn’t favor. The school is located in Los Angeles, specifically in the Westchester neighborhood, about four miles north of LAX. A prime location. With the beach Playa Del Rey being only 2.6 miles away, I practically have the ocean at my fingertips (an absolute non-negotiable). LA has diverse and delicious food, offering so many options. Aside from the location, the campus itself stands out on its own. The beautiful architecture was alluring. And unlike previous schools I’ve toured, the size of it didn’t consume me. Classes consist of an average of twenty students, meaning your teachers know you not only by name, but by character as well. The ability to form relationships with professors can be tricky, or even impossible at larger schools, but not at LMU. I could genuinely go on and on about the utter perfection of this school, but I would begin to bore you at some point. If LMU is not on your list, I would highly advise you to reconsider adding it.
It’s getting closer every day. The more time passes, the closer it looms, like someone watching over your shoulder. Although you can’t see them, you can constantly feel their presence. It makes it somewhat challenging to focus on the present when the future keeps moving forward. Once November 1st arrives, people will be applying and waiting to hear back from colleges, marking the beginning of our future.
After that happens, the floodgates will open. People will be either delighted or disappointed with their response from their colleges. It makes me think of all previous seniors, were they this stressed, yet excited? Were some of them sure of their likelihood of getting in, only to be rejected, or were they correct?
The more I think about it, the thought that almost constantly remains the same is that after November 1st, what will happen to my friends? Where will they go? Will we be as close as we are now after departing? Or will we slowly begin to fade from each other’s lives? As these thoughts sometimes consume me, it is those exact friends that pull me back in and remind me to enjoy now.
College is coming. I have realized that I waited a bit too long to start my extracurriculars. I did some things in my sophomore year, but the colleges that I want to get into need far more than what I have accomplished. Even though it’s a hard process, I think I can do it. My ability to get into the colleges I really want relies solely on my shoulders, and it’s up to me to make my dream come true. People aren’t lying when they say that you need to start doing stuff freshman year. Other people around me seem to not care as much, and I end up thinking that I might be stressing myself out. However, I know what I want to do, and I know what I need to do in order to get into good colleges, and that’s up to me. I need to stop worrying about what everyone else is doing.
In my head, I am still a 13-year-old girl who just discovered makeup and spent my weekends at home with my family. In reality, I’m a 16-year-old girl with my driver’s license and I spend most of my free time with my friends. People have always told me “high school flies by” but why did it actually. How am I going to be deciding where I want to live in a year from now. What do you mean I won’t live at home anymore and I won’t be surrounded by the people I’ve grown up with. What if I don’t like where I end up or I get homesick. I have always wanted to leave Ojai but now I’m facing the reality of leaving all my best friends and it has left me distraught. I’ve begun to look at colleges but the thought of being all on my own is very scary. I can barely make a meal and do my laundry. I have such a big fear of being independent. I don’t like being alone I rather be with my friends or family and the thought of college heavily terrifies me.
It’s almost 2025. That’s the year I’ve been looking forward to all my life. I’m not so sure I’m excited anymore. Yeah, college is exciting, but I’m not ready to finish high school. Anyway, I’ve finished and submitted all my college applications. It’s a funny feeling because everyone around me is so ready to graduate, and they all have something to work towards. I don’t have a career I’m excited about or a dream college. The only thing I have been working towards is a D1 team and now I know I won’t be on one. I’m afraid because when I don’t have something to work towards I start to wander again. I feel like a zombie. I don’t want to lose my focus. Everything is moving so fast and I can’t believe it’s almost 2025. There are so many things I would do if I had more time. I better fit it all in quickly because there are 78 more days until 2025.
I must be missing something. I feel like I have finished my college applications. I mean I have all of my writing done and it’s all final drafts. I’m proud of my work and feel like I’m ready to submit it all. I finished all of my questions and input my grades. I did extra stuff that I didn’t have to and I looked over and revised it all. I even toured almost every college on my list. Everyone said that applying was the most stressful part of high school but I think I must have over prepared for the stress this summer. I’m joining the volleyball team because I have so much extra time. I love it don’t get me wrong, but I’m just confused. I even wrote all of the Personal Insight essays before I realized there were only four. I don’t feel myself getting senioritis like everyone says. I must have just not had as many supplemental essays as anyone else. who knows. At least I get to do volleyball though.
I feel like the system of college applications is so interesting. It’s crazy how much time, effort, money, and well-being people put into working towards the standard of what is considered a “solid” application. There are so many aspects of one’s application, too, that require so much of everything listed above. First, of course, are the grades. GPA, AP Test scores, and SAT/ACT scores are all big factors in how a student is portrayed academically, which I think is such a lame system. Basically, even if a student performs well in an in-class environment and puts in a bunch of effort in their homework and learning the material, ultimately, a lot of it depends on whether or not they are a good test taker. If not, because so many of the massive assessments of one’s grade are based on how well they perform on tests, a good student may seem on the outside to be one who barely puts in time and doesn’t care about their academic standing. Next is the college essay. I have heard too many horror stories about how the best writers come out with pretty awful essays that do not represent them well as writers or even as a person, just because of the stress the system puts one under to come out with such a magnificent piece of writing. On top of the grades and essays, you have all of the many extracurriculars. If you weren’t already burnt out trying to put in effort for school as well as lead a normal social life and give yourself time to rest, there are a million other things that “good and successful” students that want to get into a top-notch college should be doing with their time. Some of those include being in Student Council, a part of school programs such as Student Leadership or Dorm Prefects, participating in in-school programs such as Journalism or Yearbook, varsity or club sports, community service hours, and even holding a stable part-time job on top of it all. In my mind, it just seems like so much pressure to put on teenagers, half of them are not even sure what they want to do the rest of their lives. So now, they are putting in everything they have just to get accepted into the best university or college they possibly can. And the thing is, half of those top-notch places are not even worth the hype, at least in my opinion. So many people are striving to get in just because of the name or the reputation that barely holds any weight in the long run. I feel like I could talk about this process for actual hours, but it is something I am passionate about just considering it is such a big part of my and a lot of people’s lives around me.
OVS Journalism Blog 
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