With March Madness looming, the science of bracketology has taken America by storm. With 64 teams in the running, I’m sure you are all aware of the competition to name the exact winner and who beats who etc., etc. Now I must inquire, where the hell is my german zoo animal when I need one?

If it were up to me, I’d have them predict my choices or at least my 8/9 and 7/10 games. Between Paul the octopus correctly predicting the world cup (r.i.p) and Heidi the cross-eyed possum predicting the Oscars, last year’s winner Jake Johnson’s method of deciphering and guessing the winners was not one of classical analysis and probability based on past contests and statistics. He used the help of his pet guinea pig.

As you can see nowadays, the commercial for March Madness has shown us all kinds of uses. While some believe it is simply luck and others believe that it is science, I opt for the animal kingdom. Who knows, it might work out for me.

Happy betting.