Sick

The past week, I have been catching up on all the work I missed when I was sick. I realize I can’t take another sick day as I finish my work. I am missing so much work it’s not even comedic. We are in chapter 4 of AP World, and I haven’t done notes on 3.1 yet. I have two SARs and a whole essay to write, as well as the outline. All of this is from a book I did not read. I tried to read the book but I have a short attention span, and this is the worst book too. My brothers were doubting how actually sick I was and this deeply angered me. I was literally on my deathbed. I had a 104 fever for 3 days and slept around 3 hours a night. I couldn’t lie down because I would get so congested I felt like i couldn’t breathe. I went to the ER to get tested for strep throat and the flu and they both came back negative as well as my covid test. The other people in the ER looked rough like i felt on my deathbed but these people made me feel better. One girl had like no hair and said she had been feeling sick to her stomach and wanted to get tested for E. coli and salmonella. In this waiting room while my mom filled out endless paperwork I listened to the stories of the people in their and am grateful for being healthy now.

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yes officer i got my licenses 4 days ago

This story talks about how I managed to get pulled over after having my license for four days.

On a tranquil night, I departed from my house at about 11 p.m. on the 15th of September. It was another typical night, and I was going to the gym because one of my friends pressured me even though I was already sleepy and wanted to sleep so I decided to go. Now it was normal at the gym that night, some goofing around since we had the whole place to ourselves. Once we were done my friend who had biked to the gym was about to bike back but I decided to offer him a ride back since it was dark and at 2 a.m. So we decided that it would be a good idea if I drove him back. so we put his bike into the back of my Prius, which was harder than expected. Eventually, we departed into the night expecting this ride to be uneventful and quick, god had other plans. As we took a right onto the main road we drove for about 30 seconds where we passed a cop. we passed him with no issues, and I was so confident to even say, “Nothing suspicious to see the officer ” while driving by the cop. Well, Apparently, he must have heard me say that because about three seconds later while looking in my rearview mirror to make sure he doesn’t follow us he whips THE FASTEST U-Turn I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE. He pulls up right behind me getting very close to my car, and just tailgates me and my friend for what feels like 10 minutes but in reality was 1-minute max, regardless that was still a while and I don’t know if he was trying to scare me into doing something illegal but I eventually take a turn towards my friend’s house and the cop follows, it’s at this point I knew I was getting pulled over. Right on cue, he turns on those lights, and I pull over. Eventually, after waiting for about a minute the cop walked up to my window (which was already down since I didn’t want to anger him by asking to roll it down). He leaned in and said, “Hey just wanted to let you know that your headlight was out nothing else was wrong but you should know and get that fixed” This was definitely one of the better things you can get pulled over for and was quite the refile knowing that I wasn’t smuggling drugs or weaving in and out of the road or something along those lines. The cop noticed that my friend in the car was a little nervous so he popped the question,” can I have your license and regressions please” Now this is a normal question; however, the DMV hasn’t sent me a license yet so I had to hand him this rinky dinky piece of paper and he looks at it and says “is this your license?” and I say “yes officer sorry I recently got my license so they haven’t sent me the card yet” he gives a shrug and says he’s going to run it through his system and heads back to the car. so he comes back and say ” So it says that you got your license 4 days ago so here’s what I could do, I could give you two tickets one for driving someone in your car and one for driving at 2 am but sense your still a new driver I don’t want to screw you over and ruin your driving career.” to cut the story a bit short he eventually lets me go after a few more embarrassing questions like ” it says you got your license on 9/11 is that correct” and I didn’t know so I just said yes and hoped it was correct. but we eventually got home say and on my way back from dropping off my friend, I passed by another cop who turned in my direction but didn’t pull me over maybe the other cop told them I already gotten got. 

please note all these quotes are from the author’s memory so they just give a rough idea not an exact

Thoughts on Social Media

For me personally, I have a lot of social media. I use Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, and Pinterest. I stay off Twitter because I think that the new CEO is a little interesting, and I don’t use Facebook because I am under the age of thirty-five. However, I like other social media – to an extent. I think there are many positives to using them, such as staying in touch with friends and family, keeping up on current events, and using them as an outlet for creativity or simply unwinding from your day. The problems arise, however, when phone addiction starts becoming prevalent. Also, there can be issues with the spread of false information, cyberbullying, and overall too much time spent on these apps. So, like everything, there are pros and cons. Personally, I try to limit my interaction with these negatives by one, limiting my screen time; two, not trusting everything I see on TikTok, for example, and doing my own research, and three, blocking accounts and people who only spread negativity. I set a limit of only 30 minutes allowed on TikTok, Instagram, or Pinterest and 40 on Snapchat. I also try to only go on social media during specific times of the day as to not distract myself from staying in the present moment. Why do all this and not just delete the apps off of my phone? I actually really enjoy using Snapchat and Instagram to keep in contact with my friends – both current and old – and see what they are up to. Although social media is obviously not reality, it is nice to see a slice of what and how people I know are doing. For TikTok and Pinterest, I actually really look forward to relaxing on these apps to take away the stress of my busy school life. The information on these apps is not always the most positive, educational, or worthwhile, but I still enjoy unwinding by watching some videos or scrolling through my feed. This is why I set limits for myself because, before I did, I would find myself on these apps for hours a day, wasting my time and my brain power on things that aren’t even a real part of my life. But, when consumed in smaller doses, using social media, for me, comes with a bunch of positives that no adult can convince me to otherwise take out of my life.

Social Media: how to use it safely - NCSC.GOV.UK

PC: https://www.ncsc.gov.uk/images/social-icons.jpg

My crippling addiction

A little over a year ago, I was introduced to something that would come to change my life, probably for the worse. At first, I thought it was something innocent and fun, however, it turned sour and harmful very fast. You might be wondering now what this addiction could possibly be. Is it alcohol? Is it vaping? Is it hard drugs? No. It’s Stardew Valley. Now Stardew Valley is a simple 2D game that is a fun and chill game to play where you can farm, forge, mine, fish, befriend villagers, and other calm and relaxing activities, but Progen, how could this chill and relaxing game ruin your life? I HAVE NO IDEA WHY. for some god-forsaken reason, I can not stop playing that stupid game no matter how hard I try it’s physically impossible i am just addicted to the small dopamine I get for completing the quest or when doing another task in the game. I really need to stop because my grades are slipping because of that game along with my mental health. 

Math Will Be My Downfall

Math will be my downfall. I have never been good at math, but I have always found a way to get an acceptable grade in my classes, even if I have no idea what is going on. This year, I have had three different math teachers which already completely set me back. I am in Algebra 2 this year and I just don’t understand anything at all. The first month of school, I wasn’t listening in class at all because I was distracted by my best friend. On every single quiz or test that I have taken, I have gotten an F and I genuinely don’t know what to do because now that I’m focused in class, I still have no clue what i happening. On my first test of got a 27 percent. It is really upsetting to me that I was so happy when I got back my most recent quiz and saw that I got a 58 percent.

Calculator Math” by Michal Jarmoluk/ CC0 1.0

College Trip

I’m writing this blog post early because I’m leaving to go visit my sister in college tomorrow. This post is about the upcoming trip and college and it’s really all over the place 🙂

Not only am I excited to see where my sister goes to school but also because it’s where my mom went to college. My mom has always been my biggest role model so it’s intriguing to see where she lived during such a critical part of her life. I’d like to be able to picture my mom at my own age and the way she lived her life. I’ve always wished that I could meet my mom at the age I am now.

My sister recently told me that she wants me to go to the same college as her. This was an absolute shock. I questioned her reasoning and replied saying that she doesn’t even like me that much. Despite my skepticism, she stood firm backing her statement. Clearly college really does make people miss their family and reminisce about childhood. Whatever her thought process, I’m just happy that she actually wants me around or at least wants me to see a glimpse into her life.  

Teachers have always told me how much of a leap up college is from high school but I’m not convinced. Everyone I’ve talked to in college has told me that it’s exponentially better than high school. I completely and full-heartily and possibly naively believe them. My sister’s hardest class is Spanish 4 and that doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that she’s in college. Let’s just say despite my family’s many talents, not one includes being linguistically inclined. I personally feel like everything is easier when you’re doing it on your own terms, and when you are in college, everything is up to you.  

In addition to seeing my sister, I get to visit my family in Maryland who I rarely get to see and I also once again get a taste of freedom. It’s crazy to me how before coming to OVS I couldn’t care less about flying across the country but now it’s turned into something highly anticipated. Every day where I feel in control is now a blessing.

Airplane Blue” by Tomasz%20Gaw%u0142owski/ CC0 1.0

My future plan.

To think about what the future holds is daunting. The me one year ago would have no idea what to think of my life today. As everyone gets older life gets harder. Loved ones pass, and people come and go in the lives we all have. As a person who overthinks so much, I of course already have a blueprint of the future I want for myself. I spend hours on Pinterest scrolling through the lives of others building up a plan. My future life will have to be aesthetic duh…just kidding. The future I want for myself does consist of “perfection,” but the faults in life will bleed through ruining the idea of a “perfect” life. This is how I want it. Of course, I will like for my life to be cute but I want others around me to realize not everything in life is perfect and everyone has their own faults and issues occuring. Anyway, enough with reality. I romanticize what college I will attend, leading into my lifelong career to support the family I want for myself. I am not really sure where I want to live but I have many ideas. Maybe somewhere the leaves will turn brown and at the least an hour or two away from some form of a beach. Something extremely personally important to me in my plan is for my kids to not have to go through childhood as I did. With this I want to take my skills I have now implement my skills into things for college and create the best life I can give to myself. Anyways since I have been sick I have been on Pinterest a lot so I have been obv making a Pinterest board about it so I thought I would write about it. Bye!

PC: me

rant

Sometimes I hate everything about myself. I sit in my room and I think about all of the things I’ve done wrong. All of the things I wish I hadn’t said or done and all of the things I regret. I take so much time looking in the mirror and picking out all of the things I hate about my face and my body. I think about how I’m going to change it and how I’m going to eat healthy and be cleaner and workout more. I think about how I’m going to change my brain and begin to grow and talk less and take up less space with unimportant things. But it never changes. I never really make the effort even though I want to be different so bad. I really am trying to be better and have better self-talk, but it’s so hard when I want to change everything about my personality. Everyone wants what they don’t have, I guess. Im learning to love myself even if its hard

Softball

I used to play softball. I started playing t ball on a team with my sibling when I was 4. That’s when my dad started coaching me. From there, I kept playing on youth teams every year. Softball for me was always the fun sport. My dad always found a way to make practice amusing. We’d play games such as sunflower seed spitting contests and home-run derby’s. At every game there was a never ending variety of crazy snacks in the dugout and continuous scream of obnoxious cheers that were the best. Even when I played on All-Star teams there was a positive energy. Once I started playing volleyball, I truly appreciated softball because it was an outlet without all the pressure. 

I’ve always loved travel tournaments for both volleyball and softball. The difference is that for softball we’d be out in the pool eating whatever we wanted, till whatever time, and setting off fireworks in the middle of nowhere while the parents were out drinking at a bar.  For volleyball, we had a schedule, people commenting on our diets, a curfew, and my mom making sure I was in bed by ten while we dissected the contents of how I played; everything was more intense.  In softball, it didn’t ruin my day when I didn’t play as well as I wanted to because I never had any crazy expectations and didn’t hold myself to a crazy standard. With all that being said, softball was never my sport like volleyball was, I never had the same type of love. What made it so worthwhile was the team and the players. I ended up playing through my freshman year in high-school but at that point I was burnt out and had hit a wall. I wasn’t having the same fun I used to have when I was younger and it was exhausting driving 45 minutes straight from softball to volleyball and then getting home at 10. At that point it had lost the purpose it originally served. I played softball for as long as I did because it was something my dad and I always bonded over. We’ve never been as close as when I was playing softball. Volleyball for mom, softball for dad. I’ll always love softball and it will always be a big part of my childhood. 

Softball on field“/ CC0 1.0

blog of my life

When I write a blog every week, I feel like I spend more time wondering what to write about than I do writing. I am already wondering what I will write about next week.

But that aside, this week I would like to write a little about my past. Every time I write this blog I am reminded of my elementary school. Because I kept a one-page notebook diary every day from the first grade to the sixth grade. I cried when I was little because I was chased by farm animals, and I started washing my own hair at the age of 1.5 years old because I wanted to imitate my older sister in everything. I grew up with a lot of love from my teachers in kindergarten. I attended an all-girls school from elementary school until the summer after my freshman year of high school. My memories of elementary school were about trying different things. I did many things at school, such as being a member of the class council and student body president. My favorite class was physical education. I took first place in physical fitness two years in a row. The thing I looked forward to most on weekends was going on the trapeze with my friends. In junior high school, I gave up ballet, which I had been doing since I was two and a half years old, and started playing soccer. This was a big change for me, as every weekend and every vacation was filled with soccer. However, soccer was my youth, and I can’t count the number of things I gained from it. Also, the short-term study abroad program I mentioned in middle school was a big reason why I am here in the U.S. now, and it has changed my life. I lead a rather mundane life, but the people I have met have been wonderful and have enriched my life.

I am very much looking forward to the people and environments I will meet in the future. To be honest, I am dreading the preparation for college. lol

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