This will probably be the first and last post where I’m this free-spoken, but I know this will be therapeutic. I know we all have bad days, but what do you do when the closest people to you are just gone in a matter of seconds? What do you do when suddenly that someone becomes just a memory and you realize that you can’t make any new ones with them?
As I’ve found out for myself when everything is going great, suspiciously good, the universe has to balance it out. The Bob Ross quote, “Gotta have opposites dark and light, light and dark in painting. It’s like in life. Gotta have a little sadness once in a while so you know when the good times come. I’m waiting on a good time now,” me too Bob, me too.
In moments like this, you feel like an outsider to the world and you just want to get away, distract yourself somehow. But I’ve forced myself to accept and face the facts: time heals, but you need a lot of it.
Yesterday, I went to an escape room with my friends in the Ventura Harbor. Out of pure stupidity, we decided to sign up for the hardest room, The Wizards Lair, with a 25% success rate.
The amount of hidden clues in the room was incredible.
We headed into the room, which we first thought was the only one. There was a desk in the middle of the room with an array of things on it, but the main thing was a box with a fairy in it, which was the object of our escape.
We were to free the fairy in the box because the fairy gave our town good luck and fortune; but, when the fairy was stolen it cursed our town forever.
Our group started off by unlocking the first box which granted us light to our dark, murky room; and gave us wands which helped us unlock another box.
There were many more clues in the room. The last major clue was the bookshelves, which corresponded with the symbols and number on the potions and scrolls. After we figured out the code that corresponded with the books on the bookshelves, the bookshelves moved revealing another hidden room.
We were so excited because we thought we had beat the room, only to discover we had only made it through 50% of it.
Sadly, we did not make it fully through the room in time, but that is only going to make us want to go back again, to try and beat it next time.
The Ultimate Escape Room Ventura, CA From: venturabreeze.com
I’ve never been in love before, but I know what it looks like.
This Saturday night I went to a bowling alley with my brothers and friends. We were there for nearly three hours, and in that time lots of people came and went.
As I was waiting for my turn to bowl, I inadvertently noticed a couple move into the lane next to mine. They must have been in a relatively new relationship; they still had that air of flustered, nervous excitement. They were probably somewhere in their thirties.
The first thing that caught my eye was her chevron striped, orange and red and dark green skirt that came to just above ankles adorned with bright pink socks peeking out of chunky bowling shoes. Somehow, though, the outfit wasn’t really what stood out. She had wispy blonde shoulder-length hair and thinly framed round glasses.
The second thing that caught my eye was her date. He was just a few inches taller than she was and he also had glasses. His didn’t have rims though, just two lenses that floated in front of his eyes. They complemented his square jaw and short-cropped brown hair.
Since they were right across from me, I got to observe the couple for quite awhile. I was captivated.
It wasn’t because they were stunningly handsome or eccentric, in fact they were just sort of plain, normal looking. They weren’t unattractive, but weren’t strikingly beautiful either. She was probably an Anne or Jane or a Cathy, and he might have been a Scott or maybe a Mark or something along those lines.
She first stood up to take her turn. She trotted up to the line and made a very uncoordinated attempt at throwing the bright orange ball, which almost immediately went into the gutter. She spun around on the balls of her feet, and shyly laughed at the unfortunate result of her inability. He watched her as she walked back to him and he was laughing too.
Image via Pinterest.com
Plucking a ball from the rack, he began demonstrating how to properly throw it. And he didn’t put his arms around her in that uncomfortably corny way movies do. He just stood in front of her, swung his arm back and forth, explained his technique.
She tried again, extending her arm out in front of her and throwing the ball towards the pins. It slowly made its way down the lane and knocked over two or three pins on the outer right side.
“See!” he exclaimed with genuine pride. “That was already so much better!” They were both beaming. She scuttled back to their chairs, he rose to his feet, wrapped his arms around her and lightly kissed her forehead.
Over the course of the night I became very sure that they both enjoyed science and books, rainy weather and went to large public high schools where they maybe played in the marching band. As I pieced together these imaginary details I also realized some obvious truths in that they were completely enjoying each other’s company and they were completely happy.
As Scott or maybe Mark returned back to his chair he stopped midway to dance to the Britney Spears classic “Womanizer,” pointing his fingers in the air and bouncing from side to side. She threw her head back, laughed. This made me smile, too, because right then another thing became very clear to me: they were in love.
I don’t know if they knew it yet, but I definitely did.
I’ve seen lots of young couples out on dates before, but for some reason this was the first one that has made such an impact. Being able to see these two people who seemed to be so plainly normal and were out on a plainly normal date. But they were so, so happy. Bowling really isn’t a very exciting activity, but they were perfectly content just being with each other.
They probably could have been anywhere in the world and still showed that same subtle adoration. It didn’t matter that there were people all around them in that bowling alley because they were only looking at each other.
There are many things I love in life, and one of those happens to be animals, more specifically horses. I’ve grown up around horses since I was young. Horses are amazing, and if anyone knows me, I talk about horses all the time. My aunt had five of her own horses, and her retired off-the-track thoroughbred named Maggie was one of the first horses I ever learned how to ride on.
Horses have always been a very important part of my life. In sixth grade, my uncle told me that he signed me up for horse camp, and at first I thought “Ha. Very funny, not happening.” But I never would’ve thought that that camp would’ve been an open door that led me to one of my true passions. I never thought I’d be owning my own horse.
It was in April of my freshman year. My aunt came up to me and asked me if I wanted to go to an auction to see baby horses. I knew, logically, I should’ve said no, because I knew we were going to fall in love with one of them and then we’d want to buy a new horse. We already had five horses, but you can never have too many horses… right? Well, neither my aunt nor I believed that because when we left the auction, we already had our hearts belonging to one horse.
His name is Scapa. Right now he’s two and a half years old, but he was just a yearling when I got him. It was less than a month before I was getting my back surgery, and I was not sure if I’d have the chance to ride for another year, but I knew I still wanted to work with horses. My aunt got him for $1500, and over the summer before my sophomore year it was my job to help train him for his first halter class, where he won third place.
Though I’ve only had Scapa for a year and a half, I’ve realized several times that Scapa will most likely live into my forties. While I’m in college, going to law school, and even afterwards, my horse will still be there. Horses will always be there for me, and the fact that as I grow up Scapa will be also, it’s something really special that I’m incredibly thankful for.
People who’ve never been around horses are never really able to understand how much of a treasure it is to form a bond with a horse. Horses have always been my best friends in animal form. Any time I’ve had a bad day, I would go down to the barn and my horse would immediately make my mood happier. From horse shows to camping trips to Ireland, the highlights in my life have always involved horses, and it’ll probably be that way for years to come.
Recently I have been doing some self-reflection. I’ve found a few things that I want to work on, so maybe writing them out will help me incorporate them into my daily life. To my dear self, a few suggestions for personal growth:
1. Be present: Simply put: memories are better stored in your head than they are on Snapchat. Enjoy what is happening right in front of you.
2. Listen: Really listen to what people around you are actually saying. Don’t just nod along and then reply with, “Hey, do these jeans look better cuffed?” My hope is that this will help you to be a better friend and communicator.
3. Appreciate and enjoy: Don’t dwell on sadness. Sometimes life can be frustrating or boring and that’s okay. Make the most out of every day, appreciate even the smallest things. Don’t make excuses for why you can’t have fun today, just go out and find it.
4. Take care: You only have one body, one mind, one planet. Do your best to care of them.
5. Think before you speak: Mom is especially fond of this one. As much as I wish it weren’t true, how you say something impacts what you are saying.
6. Relax, no one cares: A while ago I didn’t order a drink I wanted because it was called “The Shangri-La,” and I was afraid of mispronouncing it and sounding stupid. The point is, don’t skip out on opportunities for fear of embarrassment. Most of the time, nobody is going to care, let alone notice, if you say something incorrectly. And even if you do mess up, just laugh it off – it’s what you do best.
7. Be yourself: Now I know this one is quite a cliché, but I think it’s important to remember. One aspect of this comes from my experiences with random strangers. Sometimes I find myself putting up a shy front when in public or talking with people I don’t know (E.g. the barista who could have made “The Shangri-La”). You are a social, people-person! Don’t be afraid to be friendly! You should be proud of that. This point is particularly important to keep in mind as you move through your teenage years, where so much pressure is placed on everything involving your personality, appearance, etc. No one ever got anywhere by being the same as everyone else. If certain people don’t like you for exactly who you are, you don’t need those people in your life. You will attract everyone you need for a supportive and fulfilling life by simply being you.
For now, this is all I have. Surely with time this list will continue to grow and improve – and hopefully I will, too.
You know that people will be leaving, projects are due, and so is all the school work from the past few months that you’ve hidden under your bed in denial. So I find myself strangely lonely, isolated even.
But I’m ready for summer, and my introvert battery needs a recharge. You’d think being “isolated” now would help, but it’s different.
Right now I’m isolated by work and change, in summer – recharge mode – I am isolated by choice and enjoyment of being alone. It’s different.
Photo Credit: npengage
Given the choice, I would skip the entire last two months of school, jump straight into summer and then into the new school year. But alas there are the last two months.
I don’t really like change, and maybe that’s why I isolate myself – at least I think it’s a self driven isolation. I hope it is, because the alternative option is that no one likes me. But that’s beside the point. I don’t like change because it takes me a long time to warm up to anything, and change is like a bucket of ice water on what tolerance and comfort I build up.
I’m not saying change is bad, I’m just saying I don’t like it. On top of that, I hate goodbyes. They’re often mushy and huggy and declarative, definite, final.
The end of the year approaches, and I feel kinda lonely and things are changing, fast.
It’s here!… Wait… What? Our class is graduating from high school? That’s not possible, I thought the year just started?
Yes guys, graduation is finally here and this is the last blog I am going to write for the Ojai Valley School Journalism team. For those of you who read my blog one month ago which talked about how graduation is right around the corner, well here we are, just a couple of days away from a huge turning point in our lives.
All those grueling, yet memorable years and the lessons we have learned from our peers and faculty have been, and will forever be, engrained into our hearts. I still remember three months ago, talking to one of my friends about whether or not I’d be able to remember what we had talked about that night. Believe me, I do remember what we talked about, and that moment also taught me that time passes like sand slipping through your hands.
Okay, that’s enough blabbering from me… But I want to wish everybody good luck! It’s been a joy writing blogs for the OVS Journalism team. Here we go!!! It is graduation!!!
When I was in elementary school I first encountered Calvin and Hobbes. Since then it has resurfaced in various parts of my life surprisingly more and more topically.
Bill Watterson’s perennial comic often addresses the problems and anxieties of growing up, the pain of reality, and everything in between.
Watterson manages to cleverly address issues that still persist today through the eyes of the constantly adventurous and surprisingly observant six-year-old boy.
To this day, I find myself enjoying the comics in spare moments, pulling out weather-beaten copies with broken binding hoping to find a laugh or something to prove that I’m not just panicking, that growing up is indeed hard.
Watterson manages to perfectly characterize the angsty feelings of growing up and having to face oncoming reality, and sometimes it just makes me laugh and feel happy despite the panic I feel about having to continue to grow into adulthood.
But my personal favorite remains the very last panel Watterson ever drew for Calvin and Hobbes:
Looking back five years, I still remember when I first stepped on campus at Ojai Valley School as an 8th grader. Fear of the uncertain filled my heart; I didn’t know what to expect and what challenges I would have to overcome at my new school. I gave my parents one last hug right before my dorm parent called me back into the dorms, and in that moment I knew I wouldn’t see my parents for at least three months, the longest I had been away from my parents at that time.
As scary as being a boarding student was, I have overcome it and made it to the very end, which is being a senior at Ojai Valley School. I still can hardly believe that it has been four years since I graduated middle school, and five years since I decided to leave home in Shanghai to come to school in the United States. There were a lot of things that I wanted to do during my high school years, and I have done many of them and feel accomplished because of it. Checking each thing off in my mind is a relief. I’m that much closer to my goal.
Looking forward, graduation is almost here. I have been through four proms, at least eight camping trips, played on a lacrosse team, was a stagehand for three plays, survived English 11, and lived with six different roommates. There are countless other memories, including having seen a lot of my former classmates/teammates graduate high school. I’m wondering what it will feel like to finally check off the last thing on my “To Do” list in high school — to sit on the stage listening to Mr. Cooper address us for the last time, and for his last time, because as we graduate he is retiring. It’s the end of an era for both of us, and the beginning of something new.
Four years have passed since the class of 2017 entered high school as freshmen. Four years later, it’s the last few weeks of our senior year, the last few weeks in high school. Graduation looms around the corner. Oh, the joy of finally finishing these four grueling years, yet what good memories are in those years.
We should all take some time to think about what we have accomplished in these four years and what we have learned from friends and teachers. These memories should send chills down our spines when we think about good memories with the great people we got to know during our time here at school.
It is hard to believe that it is all about to end. We’ll soon be waking up the day after graduation thinking: “Where did these years go?” So hug your friends harder, because this might be the last time you’ll see them – the reality of graduation is just a moment away. Hold your breath, because this is one of the biggest milestones of our lives. This is the one that defines us as adults, the one that marks our accomplishments as students. Prepare yourself, because graduation will catch you off guard.
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