Satara

I walked into the room, bare of furniture save a polished teak table with a single crystal wine decanter sitting directly in the center.

Sparkling idly in the half-light, the decanter was shaped like an elongated pear; its tapered neck leading down to a rounded belly filled with dark red liquid. Only about a third full, even the color of the wine bled expensive taste, promising heavenly flavor.

The crystal etchings were sharp and severe, each ridge and curve flowing into the next in a symphony of crystalline delicacy. Looking like a frozen sea, the etchings were arranged in a snowflake shape that started at the heart of the decanter and stretched up and out, the tendrils of fineness touching every inch of its gleaming surface.

Reaching out, I touched it with one finger.  The glass was cool and smooth against my skin, the swirling designs felt hard and deliberate.  I gently flicked the decanter.

A lonely warbling note rang out, piercing the air with its high and tremulous sounds.  Stillness filled the room as the peal faded away, captured purity in its essence.  

Ripples appeared in the wine, slight disturbances skittering lightly across the surface of the red liquid.  I watched, transfixed by the sudden flurry.  

The door opened.  A young woman walked in, her face shadowed as she approached the table.  As she came into the light, I was struck by her beauty.  

Tall and slender, she stood with the controlled grace of a ballerina; her long legs and thin ankles were crossed attractively , one in front of the other. Clear, soft skin, the color of magnolia blossoms, glowed with a creamy light.  Golden hair like gleaming flax hung straight down her back in thick, shiny sheets, setting off the alabaster skin to perfection.  Black lashes cast shadow crescents on high cheekbones accentuating the hot pink flush.  Cupid’s bow lips were set in a tight hard line, emphasizing their rosy red color.  

Her eyes were chilling.  Startling amethystine violet, they were fierce and fiery.  Savage brightness illuminated their deep purple depths.  Laced with stormy silver tendrils they were luminescent and vehement, only enhancing her sultry radiance.  

She looked nothing like the girl I loved.

Satara,” I said with a confidence I did not feel, “you’re back.”

She stepped forward, a murderous gleam in those gemstone eyes.  “Yes, Jason,” she snarled, spitting my name like a curse, “I’ve returned.  But only to deliver a message.”

Oh?  And what’s that?”

She wrapped her slim fingers around the neck of the decanter and squeezed as if she could break the crystal.  Looking back up into my eyes she continued to strangle it.  

I was entranced by the color of those eyes, unable to look away.

“My sister is dead.”

What?”

A roar louder than all the waves in the ocean filled my ears and filled my head with searing heat.  Blood began to fill my eyes and the redness tinged my vision.

Satara screamed and threw the decanter, it shattered inches from me, spattering my clothes and leaving bloody crimson stains.  

“She’s dead, Greek,” she shrieked, “Sahar is dead!” 

Marble Beauty

I found her very beautiful, in a hard, unfeeling sort of way.  She reminded me of a statue, just as rigid and half as inviting.  Her eyes were distant, cold.  Smooth skin, three shades lighter than caramel glowed in the pale light. 

She was thin and small, barely five feet three inches tall.  Her slenderness only emphasized the delicacy of her frame but the muscles in her arms and legs were defined and clearly visible. Bones and tendons showed though the exquisite skin of her hands and faint bluish veins drew intricate designs beneath the surface. 

Her jaw was fine and just a degree rounded enough not to be considered angular.  Cheekbones, not high but rather mild, were tinted the barest flush of coral. 

Glossy dark hair of burnished mahogany curled gently around a heart-shaped face.  It spilled over her shoulders and over her collarbone in a wave of soft, loose ringlets.  Pressed together, her bottom lip was slightly fuller than the top and a lush rosy pink.  She had not the barest hint of a smile. 

A small freckle dotted her cheek just to the left of her lips, pretty.  Elegant brows arched gracefully across her forehead.  Large dark eyes stared out from under curving lashes.  They held an unavoidable attractiveness, something about the color.  Like pools of sweet melted chocolate, they were liquid and had a faint sheen.  It was strange to me how they looked melted and warm while having such a frigid glint in them. 

I never understood why she was so distant, forever a mystery.  

Her name was Sahar, “dawn” in Arabic.  But she was not Arabian.  Indeed, she was fair as Dawn herself, just as soft and glowing.  

Sahar’s voice was quiet and sharp, but it had a lovely lyrical quality that took the edge off her tone.  

She didn’t like me, not one bit.  So we never spoke and I retreated, admiring from afar her perfect marble beauty.  

Butterflies, Again


Fingertips feel numb. Palms feel cold. Stomach feels light. Head feels warm.

I welcome this unease.

Two become one from 2,000 to none in perhaps less than seven.

Which makes me worry. I don’t get hungry anymore.

I welcome this unease.

I won’t be unfaithful, but I might stray. I might stray. No, only for a minute. But it is always you. Something always brings me back to you…unwillingly, powerfully, endearingly, courageously, always.

I welcome this unease.

Let the butterflies consume my heart when I see you again. Let them take over. Let them feast. Feast until they have had their fill, and more. So it will last me until our next unspoken encounter.

A Furry Surprise

10:28 AM: Monday, November 7, 2011.

A text message from my mother:

“There is a big surprise waiting 4 u. Hint: it’s furry, so sweet, and endearing…Can you get what it is?”

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m going home this weekend with my friends Anni and Sungjin. My mother had left me a long text message explaining food options and furniture and this BIG SURPRISE!

I really hope it is either a cat or a dog! I CANNOT WAIT!

If I had to choose which dog or cat I will be greeted with this weekend, it would be:

1) Scottish Fold Cat

My favorite pet by far was a Scottish Fold by the name of Butter. These cats have the sweetest disposition and a lovable face. Their eyes are very big and their ears are usually folded.

2) Chihuahua

My favorite dog was a 6 pound Chihuahua by the name of Tinkerbell. Chihuahuas, contrary to popular belief, are very intelligent creatures. Tinkerbell never barked too much either and was very very loyal.

3) Teacup Poodle

To be honest, I just want one of these because they are SO CUTE. I mean, LOOK AT IT. Ah my goodness! It makes me so nauseous because of how cute it is!

4) Bengal

I really want this cat because it is SO beautiful! It looks just like a miniature leopard! Goodness, I want it!

I hope I am not getting too caught up with this idea of having the pet be a cat or a dog because knowing my mom, she could have gotten me a nice knit scarf or a hamster.

But keeping my fingers crossed for a SCOTTISH!

Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder…


Everybody told me that long distance would be trouble. That it would hurt. That it wouldn’t be worth all the stress–especially during my senior year.

But I, being the stubborn love-struck puppy I was, didn’t listen. Nope. I didn’t want to believe what people said, so I didn’t. I told myself that it would be easy.

Now, here I am sitting in my room in Ojai, California. 2643.071 miles away from my boyfriend of two and a half years.

It’s funny. In the beginning, I had kind of wished Kai was a recluse that veered away from any female contact.

But again, the beginning was the hardest part. The time difference made it even worse. He was already at school when I would wake up most days and by the time study hall ended, it was around 12:30 in the morning where he was.

And boy, would we argue. Over the most minuscule things. I argued because we were so far. He argued because of the time difference. We argued because we missed each other. We argued. And. We argued.

I began to wonder if they were right. If long distance was too much for me to handle. It seemed, with all my college applications and school work, that they might be right.

But, as much as we fought and as much as I hated the distance, I did not want to give up.

And I didn’t. Things got better, and I honestly don’t think that long distance is all that horrible. Sure, it takes a while to get used to but if you love him (or her), all of those frustrations–those initial arguments, getting used to the time difference–was worth the greater moments when I would get to hear his voice on the phone or see his face on Skype.

I still miss him dearly and love him so much. And I don’t regret choosing to be in this long distance relationship with him. He makes me happy although I don’t get to be with him nearly as much as I did last year which turned out to be a good thing. I have more time for friends and more importantly, when I do get to see him, it makes it all the more special. It’s almost like we just started dating. There isn’t anybody I’d rather have than him.

So let me tell you from my experience that eventually, distance truly does make the heart grow fonder.

Crazy Beginning to a probably crazy week

Death and funerals are crazy. I’ve never been a fan of death, but sometimes that just kinda happens. That is what happened last night to a fallen Olivo. John Olivo Sr., my grandfather, passed away. It was a long time coming and I will be returning to Hammonton, New Jersey following the OVS boys football game against Laguna. It is a sad time, but a time where I will be able to go back to my home state and enjoy time with my family in our time of mourning.

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If I Were Brave

If I were brave,
I would straddle the tallest cliff-side,
Waver from low to high pride,
And fall just for the view.

If I were brave,
I would light myself on fire,
Let the flames crawl higher and higher,
Until the heat felt like you.

And if I were a lion
Not a mouse, instead,
I would survive every evening
And not cower in my head.

If I kept my eyes open,
With no fumble or flinch,
I would see every moment
Of I life that I miss.

If I were brave…
If I were brave…
If I were brave…
But I’m not.

So I will cower!
And cringe!
And flee from every shadow!

I will cry out!
And miss
The life that others borrow.

Because I am not brave.
I hide from every cliff.
But what if I were brave?
What if, what if, what if.

An Inner Battle.

Eagle
Sometimes there’s only so much you can do when the world is crumbling at your feet. Despite the pain, fear and distress you have to fight through no matter what. Those down days we experience are for a reason, feel them, feel the loneliness, feel the hurt, but at some point you have to come out the other end, not feeling sorry for yourself.

Since my sister left I have felt down and weary. I missed England, I missed my life, I missed everything. As I began to climb into the deep slumber of regret and sadness I forgot about everything else. Not wanting to be where I was, everyday became a greater chore. My life in California became a chore.

So as everything slipped away I thought it was about time to suck it up and not give up the fight. Driving home from school, my windows wound down, my music blaring, the sky serenely blue, the mountains picturesque on the horizon and an eagle circling overhead, I couldn’t help but to love life.

Sometimes letting go is hard but you often have to realize the good things you have in the present to gradually push away the past.


The Art of Having Fun


Today I went on a school weekend trip to Los Angeles California to the Hollywood Walk of Fame and it was fantastic. Obviously it didn’t look like the picture above, but man do I love that picture!

I had such a great time walking around and looking at all the different stars on the floor and who they represented. While I was walking and looking at these stars I was also thinking to my self how some of the people represented were chosen.

But I think that my favorite part of this day was the Madame Tussauds wax museum. The sculptures are absolutely unbelievable. They were detailed to perfection. Even the eyes looked real.

To finish my day I went and had a GREAT lunch at California Pizza Kitchen, where I had the best four cheese ravioli I have ever had.

God I love my life!

What did you do this weekend?

Bonds

Ever left home, for a long period of time, worrying if your pet will forget you?

When a dog that truly loves his master, will always greet him/her every day at the door, like it’s the first time they have seen you in over a year. Even though you just went outside for 5 minutes to go pick up some milk. It is fascinating how much a dog will care for you, love you, and miss you. But for how long?

Well I recently had to leave my dog under new temporary ownership. I may not see him again for a very long time and I was worried that, he would eventually forget me and move on. This was all until I stumbled on to this video


Like a comment said “I had to punch the wall to get my masculinity back!”

Well after seen that, my troubles lifted and flew away.

Great to see that your animal friend can be a companion for a life time.