I recently became my school’s varsity soccer goalie and was super excited for my first game. 5 minutes in, I got shat on. The other team’s striker shot a huge floater from outside the box. I saw the ball coming and thought I could get to it with ease. As I saw the ball floating in, I sheepishly backed up letting the ball hit the net above my head.
What a bummer.
I needed to have a good performance to guarantee the starting job and that is NOT what that accomplished.
The helpless feeling of the ball floating over my head. The swish sound of the ball hitting the net. The collective sigh of our fans and players. I heard and felt it all. I punted the ball out of the net disgusted with myself. Heading back to the bench I put on a show, slamming my gloves into the ground, taking off my shirt, throwing my shin pads. I could feel the judgment from players who were complacent in the goal and wanted to tell them to chill out, in fact, when one teammate gave me a glare and said something to me I just said “please shut up”.
Anyway, I have a game today and am hoping for better performance.
I recently joined the soccer team. While at first I was intimidated by both the amount of running and the fact that I haven’t played soccer in 7 years, those nerves are now gone. They have been replaced by a deep sense of regret.
For most of the high school, I didn’t have the chance to play a “real” sport. My first high school didn’t offer league sports, just smaller less official sports teams. Thought I played everything, it wasn’t real. I didn’t feel the camaraderie of a team. Then I switched schools, excited about the possibility of playing sports.
Once the sports seasons started, I picked golf because it was my best sport. I have done golf for the last 3 sports seasons since I began and have enjoyed it. I got food at the golf course, didn’t have to run, and enjoyed playing with my closest friends at my new school. This was awesome, but something I regret.
Just a week into soccer and I am already regretting my decision/inability to not play a real team sport during high school.
Practicing with friends, running, making saves. I remember all of these things from youth sports and middle school, and I miss the feelings associated with them. I miss being part of a team and more than anything, I am scared that this is my last chance to be part of a team.
I am going to make the best of this opportunity and I’m gonna push to get the starting goalie position. I want this experience to be memorable, maybe there will be an in conclusion blog in a few months.