Little bird of blue

The rays of sun beamed down from the sky laying a thick layer of warmness on the Earth’s surface. The dark yellow school bus happily chugged along the valley’s floor and up the hill to drop off the captives for their usual morning classes. Steeping briskly, as I do, I made my way to room two where I took a seat on the chilled plastic chair that I was expected to stick to like glue. My heavy books were plopped on the table as a sigh of reality takes hold of my lungs. The confining walls lined with large glass sheets let my eyes wander the landscape. The mountains breathe deep breaths of fresh air, I see their lungs fill nature and freshness. The trees sway as the mountains exhale long and slow. The room that I sit in is atop a tall hill that oversees a field. I look down upon the land that lays many feet below, just observing. Until suddenly a small scrub jay painted in blue and black leaps off of the chipped greed roof. My first thought was that his small wings and small body would plummet down to the field below. Instead, he gracefully soared through the open air. He seemed weightless and unbelievably free. I wish with all of my mind and body that I could be that scrub jay. I wish that I could weightlessly jump off of buildings and without a care float through the sky. Instead, I sit heavy and flightless.

Found on flyinglesson.us

sealed with wax

When your heart breaks

Is it like melting wax

dripping and oozing concealing the facts

then stamped by a whoever your breaker may be

hardening in place

the stamp easy to see

the next person to come along

sees that the wax is not very strong

how easily the wax could crack

with a simple are you okay

could take you all the way back

the facts concealed in the wax tight letter

spill out in hopes that it will get better

your feelings are expressed

and all it did was add stress

suddenly the thin layer of wax holding you together is broken

and you wish the feelings in the letter had gone unspoken

but spoken they were

and now your life is back into its vulnerable blur

you must reheat the wax

reconceal the facts

and start a new

in hopes that the next person will be kind to you

another idea that you have is to discard your letter

there is no point in trying to get better

the feelings are shoved into a drawer

the stamp never broken never torn

later in life

when heartbreak comes back

remember that you must over come

the cracking and oozing glum

Image found on: https://www.stampsdirect.co.uk/

a moment in the life of a Sockeye Salmon

The Alaskan glaciers melt into the icy rivers as the sockeye salmon swim upstream in hopes of population. Scales sunk with an intense array of pinks and dark reds. The salmon’s dark green heads protrude out of their thick body of flesh. In a small school, three or four fish swim passionately up the shallow stream. The stream on the verge of freezing glistened in the bright sunlight, and the salmon swimming only inches under the reflective water continue on their journey. The smell of pine swept through the chilled air and the misted grass sprouted on the side of the stream. Although life thrived outside the stream, the salmon’s life narrowed down to a single purpose. They needed to keep swimming.

image found on Pinterest

Winter

blown from the north

bringing the christmas spirit forth

it is upon us

from bikinis and heat

the season of winter

Brings about jackets and frozen feet

brushed with titanium white

The mountains are a glorious sight

rabbits, bears and coyotes alike

snuggled up somewhere warm

waiting out the winter storm

As the first frost licks the grass

and the long summer nights pass

the lakes freeze in place

The fish frozen with the same face

Dulled knives glide over the ice

the skates glide and slice

A beautiful season full of thrills and chills

Credit:Pinterest

Somewhere over the Rainbow

Have you ever thought about death?

I have.

Does it happen fast and painless?

Am I laying in a hospital bed surrounded by my family, basking in all of my successes. Nothing but happiness and satisfaction when I look back. I close my eyes with the itention of sleeping. Slipping deeper into sleep. I lose my grip on life. My lungs exhale with my last breath and Im gone.

Is that a sad way to go?

Or am I climbing Mount Everest? Each breath a fight for survival. Each step a step closer to absolute accomplishment. Maybe I started in a group of 15 and now there are two. My other partner ready to make the summit with me. We leave camp four which sits exactly at 26,000 feet. It is a day of oxygen tanks and sheer pain. The wind is generous but the air still spun with little frozen flakes. Were so close. With only a half an hour longer, my partner says he can’t make it. I push on. I make it. The snow had stopped completely. My lungs shrunk and my body crippled with the cold. Sitting down I rest. Absolute peace. The clouds hung below the mountain cutting me off from the ordinary world. Hours pass by after the excruciating journey, I let the cold take my body. The weather changes and the winds pick up. Without enough strength or carry on I sit there letting the elements take me. In my last minutes, all I can think about is the excruciatingly cold pain that rips at my skin. I close my eyes and my body is forever frozen in time.

That would be cool.

But what happens after death?

Do I instantly begin a new life? Do I get re-circulated back into the possibly ever looping birth cycle? Did I die just to die again and again and again?

Or does my energy and soul dissipate into the world erasing me completely?

These questions are unanswerable so I choose not to fear death but accept that it will happen. All I can do is live before I die.

Credit: Getty Images

On a Mountain, Under a Tree, Above the Clouds

A wise man once said to me that your trauma is not something that can be resolved. A person must take what has happened to them and learn how to survive alongside the pain, and instead of it consuming you, it becomes apart of you.

A wise man once said to me that I was meant to be great. I am not destined to do one monumental thing, he said, I am destined to be monumental.

A wise man once said to me that life was a seed that everyone is encouraged to plant. Some will plant their seed with the best of soil and it will still fail to grow. Some will grow in the crevice of two boulders, striped of all nurtience, and explode into an extraordinary tree.

A wise man once said to me that reading stories about the crystal blue sea or the towering mountains that forever reached to the heavens was not enough. He said to me that I must dive deep into salty water, and let the cold chill take over my body. He told me that I must drown in experiences, and that I must lay above the clouds.

A wise man once told me that my life is a piece of nothing in the scheme of infinity, a single electron in the sun’s ever-burning fire. He told me that beyond my sunken world there was a blackness that stretched out so far that if I were to walk the path of infinity for my entire life, I would not reach the starting line.

A wise man stared at me as I stared at him. The fogged mirror didn’t affect how clearly I saw the man looking back at me. As he gripped my eyes he said, don’t waist Oxygen trying to survive, use what you are given and try and live.

Photo Credit:Reddit

The Birth

As a woman, I am here to voice my opinions about children.

For humans, a simple act of pleasure can erupt into a death-defying stunt. It’s not only humans who do it, it is all female animals, besides the male seahorse. Heaving, pushing, urging a living thing out of your body. Draining all your strength, causing pain, and honestly leaving you a little saggy, is it worth it?

From that point forward you are, until you die, attached and sworn to this tiny human that will cause balding, lack of sleep, and stress migraines. Not to mention the, as i call it, money vacuum that you have not ignorantly created. Your bank account’s life was solid, it had a well-paying job, an apartment, a girlfriend, and maybe a cat. Then the kids come along. Your bank account had to sell its apartment and cat, doomed to a life of emptiness.

Beyond that, when your young children are awake, you are awake, and when your young children are asleep you ugh…let’s be honest do they sleep? If the off chance presents itself that they are asleep long enough for you to open and close the door after exiting their room, tiptoe over to your room get under your covers, close your eyes, and sleep, then you will either be super paranoid and not truly sleep, or you will go into something called the coma. The coma means when you awake after a beautiful sleep, that could not have been broken if World war three commenced in your front yard, your child has pooped itself, thrown up, and cried for two hours.

As your child grows you will have poured every ounce of love that you have into your kids to hopefully see them happy and successful in life. In the teenage years, that love might feel meaningless, and your children could become distant or even resent you. Of course, you will love them unconditionally, but it starts to hurt because you love them more than you have ever loved anything. Continuing on, your children have to embark on their own journey and find themselves, leaving you behind and creating their own life. You no longer have control over your kids, which is scary because you want them to stay safe, and you do not trust their safety with anyone besides yourself.

Once your children have left your house, you start to feel empty. Your purpose is gone. You have no one to care for besides yourself. You don’t know how to do that because it hasn’t been about you for 20 years. You look at yourself and realize that your life has passed by so fast and now you are old and alone. Maybe still with your partner or maybe not. You realize that nothing brought you true happiness besides your kids. Now you look forward to visits and phone calls. From mom to grandma.

You realize that purpose is all that humans crave. You have found yours. Your children give you purpose. Every day if you do not want to get up for yourself you get up for your kids. Watching them take their first steps makes up for every dirty diaper. The first day of school and offset pigtails make up for all of those sleepless nights. Holding your grandchildren make up for the hard laboring hours that got to your children’s births. Long talks, I love yous, watching your kids excel, your kids getting A’s in school, seeing them fail and get back up, you feel pride. Pride for what you have created. Pride for their accomplishments. And Pride for possessing their love.

Through all of the hardships lays a love that is irreplaceable

So asking the question again. Is it worth it?

Yes it is.

Image found on https://www.womensaidni.org/jennys-story/

Dance with me

The wind whipped sand into my face

as I walked eagerly towards the sea

the soles of my feet being searing like meat on a crackling grill of sand

but I didn’t notice because i knew what the water has in store

my foot soon touches the ocean water

the water splashed innocently over my skin

suddenly a tingling chill shoots up my toes, wraps my leg and takes hold of my chest

i step back, for a split second, from the icy creature

that looked at me with a dangerous glare

before throwing all sense out the window

and running like a child into a toy store

through the shallow waters

gliding my board through the surf

I, not so gracefully, mounted my board

landing with a thud of excitement

finding my window in between sets

I tighten my ab muscles a sink into the water with my hand

taking long, slow, methodical strokes

Making it past the break i sit up on my board

the afternoon wind blows sea spray up into my nostrils

forcing me to breathe in the oceans salty breath

forcing me to admit and secum to its power

waves role under me like moving hills

bouncing and rocking the liquefied surface that I sit on

I see my chance

a wave approaches

it starts to break to the right

paddling, scooping and urging my board to move forward

I feel the weight of the board lifted and taken by the wave

my knees drag among the top of the grainy foam board for an instant

then i spring to my feet

my knees become springs that anchor me to the board

that anchors me to the sea

the once icy beast has now become my dance partner

we tango, gracefully, down the beach

I reach my hand out as i am gliding down the wave

and feel the energy of the earth

the wave had been a single pulse

a single heartbeat from the bottom of the sea

it carried me, nurtured me, and give me safe passage back to the land

that my feet are so familiar with

but quickly the wave comes to a halt

throwing me from my board

and smushing me into the sand

submerging my body

the icy creature then again glared at me

before being drawn and pulled back into the sea

i was not offended that i had been pushed off the wave

but honored that it had accepted me and danced with me

I gathered my board

and watched all of the little pieces of negativity that i had burdened

now shattered by the sea and swept off with the creature

I left the sandy paradise

reborn

Photo Found on Wikipedia

What makes you happy?

“My friends”

“The smell of my grandmas sweater”

“Yerba”

“Watching the Sun sink behind the horizon”

“Hot coco by a fire”

“Hearing the crowd cheer at a ball game”

“Listening to music by myself”

“Driving around with nowhere to go”

“Eating cake”

“Catching a perfect wave”

“Brushing my horse”

“Feeling accomplished”

“Seeing my brother get home from collage”

“Flying on planes”

“Crying for joy”

“Getting an A”

“Kissing my wife”

“Hugging my kids”

“Finishing a painting”

“Thinking about fishing with my dad”

“Making my friends laugh”

“When I got glasses for the first time”

“Watching my child be born”

“Stargazing”

“Running Cross-county”

“Gardening in my home planted garden”

“Watching others be happy”


Each individual finds happiness, or has experienced happiness in many different ways. From the smallest things to the most life changing moments people feel happy.

For me I find happiness in the Ocean and the Forest, my family’s love, and in my friends laughter.

I encourage you to think about what makes you happy, big or small.

Special Thanks to all of the anonymous contributors that made this list of happiness possible.

Image Found on WordPress and created by Dr.Autumn W. Farr

Under my bed

Hey I say

to the monster under my bed

hello he said

to the little girl above his bed

I was a little nervous to talk to a monster

he was slimy and gross

and his eyes were too close

there were spikes protruding out of his back

he looked at me like I was a snack

he didn’t have hands Or feet

He kinda just sat there on his seat

he was a little nervous to talk to a human

she had hair coming out of her head

and she say ONTOP of the bed

Her skin was not purple or blue,

it was an odd sight

this little girl was white

Scared they both were

the little girl said

goodnight sir

pulling the covers over her head

as he retreating under her bed

they said goodnight

To the frightful sight