Tag: Future

Nostalgia

zombiegxrlLeave a comment

I’ve been attending this school for four years. I’ve had many firsts and many lasts right here in its walls. I’ve been through every whirlwind of emotions. I seem to remember something new with each step I take around campus. As the weather changes so do I. My mind flutters through the past at a million miles per second. I don’t always recall specific memories or events, instead I feel. I feel old emotions and my mind and body retreats back to the state they were in during years prior. Nostalgia is such an odd sensation. Last winter I dreaded coming to school and wanted to jump into the future so badly. Now, when I smell a certain scent, feel a familiar breeze, see the returning clouds, or hear a familiar bird, I regret not enjoying it before. I long to go back into the past and experience these smells, feelings, sights, and sounds for the first time. Nostalgia brings with it the deepest sense of longing one could possibly feel. This longing used to bring with it an unbearable sadness and yearning, but I’ve learned to appreciate and embrace it. You can never go back, never experience the past again, so why not take full advantage of the fleeting nostalgia that finds you at the most unexpected times. The next time the ominous sensation of nostalgia finds you, embrace it. Stand still and take it all in, because it’s the closest to the past you will ever get. Even more importantly, live in the moment, don’t long for the future because it’ll cause you to soon long for the past. Don’t waste your life longing, spend life enjoying the present, and enjoying nostalgia when it finds you.

Picture Credit- Google

Investing in Happiness

StrawberryMushroomLeave a comment

It is often stated that we should capitalize on our childhood and adolescent days, cherishing our time young before the responsibilities of adulthood. But while the future is always uncertain, it is also strongly emphasized that our choices, habits, and achievements during our growth, particularly during high school, heavily dictate the course of our careers and future well-being.

It feels as though the happiest people among my generation are those who care less and thus worry less. They bury themselves in constant temporary pleasures to shield themselves from unwanted responsibility and discomfort.

These people tell me I worry too much.

Then, there are people who put every waking moment to good use. They bury themselves in constant work, sacrificing momentary pleasure in favor of ensuring that their future is abundant in possibilities and is as stable as it can be.

These people tell me I’m not worried enough.

Nothing is in black and white. I can’t tell if I’m wasting my time or not making the most of my youth. I am left in a state of paralysis, unsure whether to be happier now or to invest in future happiness.

Worried about the future? The science behind coping with uncertainty | New Scientist

Picture Credit: Google

The Card

poofypuffyLeave a comment

You got a card in the mail the other day. 

It was from a couple at your church. It said “Behind you, all your memories. Ahead of you, all your dreams. May all your dreams come true.” 

The front of the card had a little graduation cap on it. They are congratulating you on your graduating, after your parents sent them a graduation invitation. 

You didn’t really understand why your parents sent out the invitations to so many people, because you don’t think they were actually requesting those people’s presence. It was more of an announcement that you were graduating. Your parents said you would understand when you’re a parent. 

But you really appreciated the card. You didn’t expect to like a card so much, but you did. 

“Ahead of you, all your dreams.” 

Your dreams, the product of your hard work, and all the little serendipitous moments to be encountered can only be waiting for you in your future, not your past, which works out really well, because that is the direction in which you are moving. 🙂

Picture Credit: Erica Steeves

I know everything will work out.

urmom8beanLeave a comment

Everything will work out. It’s a funny phrase if you think about it because you’re never really sure. No matter how much you prepare for something you never really know. I didn’t even get to finish my intro when Ben literally summed up what I was trying to say in one phrase.

Man makes plans and God laughs.

I think it’s now my favorite quote. I think it’s one of the most honest things said. It works for anything you believe in God, the universe, Jah whatever you believe they laugh at your attempts to control everything.

I don’t believe humans were ever meant to control everything no matter how hard we try it’s not the reason we are here. The people who try the most I think are often the saddest, because they try too hard and it doesn’t end up working. On the contrary, those who roll with the punches and let the wind carry them wherever it pleases are genuinely happier. At least that’s what most movies tell me.

I know everything will work out. I guess what I really mean is I was so unhappy trying to control everything, that now I’m doing a bit better. I’m letting them leave, letting go, not listening to what they say.

I really hope everything will work. I really really hope God, the universe, the higher power helps me out a little.

Man makes plans and God laughs, but I really hope he smiles instead.

We're Fireflies by gyllenmaya (remix) | Night illustration, Firefly painting, Cool art
PC:https://www.pinterest.com/pin/566398090616319765/

My future plan.

justthatonegirllLeave a comment

To think about what the future holds is daunting. The me one year ago would have no idea what to think of my life today. As everyone gets older life gets harder. Loved ones pass, and people come and go in the lives we all have. As a person who overthinks so much, I of course already have a blueprint of the future I want for myself. I spend hours on Pinterest scrolling through the lives of others building up a plan. My future life will have to be aesthetic duh…just kidding. The future I want for myself does consist of “perfection,” but the faults in life will bleed through ruining the idea of a “perfect” life. This is how I want it. Of course, I will like for my life to be cute but I want others around me to realize not everything in life is perfect and everyone has their own faults and issues occuring. Anyway, enough with reality. I romanticize what college I will attend, leading into my lifelong career to support the family I want for myself. I am not really sure where I want to live but I have many ideas. Maybe somewhere the leaves will turn brown and at the least an hour or two away from some form of a beach. Something extremely personally important to me in my plan is for my kids to not have to go through childhood as I did. With this I want to take my skills I have now implement my skills into things for college and create the best life I can give to myself. Anyways since I have been sick I have been on Pinterest a lot so I have been obv making a Pinterest board about it so I thought I would write about it. Bye!

PC: me

Time Flies…

ojaipizzaLeave a comment

After this week, I have four weeks left. I don’t know how to describe my feelings, but it all just happened too fast. Because of the pandemic, I didn’t even feel like I’m a high schooler and I’m about to go to college. For half of my high school, I’ve been staying in my house and doing homework. During the other part of my high school life, I was still busy studying and getting ready for college. I wake up, study, gym, and sleep every single day. My high school year has been very different from my expectations. I thought those things that happen in high school movies are the things that are going to happen to me, but I guess it’s just a movie, right? Time flies by way too fast. It’s really hard for me to take it slow and enjoy the moment. Even the bad times I’ve been through are going so fast.

Photo Credit: HuffPost UK

Plans For The Future

bartholomulethegreatLeave a comment

So far in my life, I have had many experiences that have shaped me into the person I am now. I have traveled all over places including Canada, Germany, and Mexico and all of these places have shown me different cultures and people. I have had the privilege to learn to snowboard and I have been riding dirt bikes for over ten years now. Even with all this under my belt, all I can wonder about is what is to come for my future. Such as where am I going to go to college and what will I learn to love, for example, I really want to major in some sort of computer-related degree such as computer science or computer engineering. But I also want to do outdoor activities such as snowboarding and dirt-biking. So I will have to find places in which I can do both, the convenient thing about the career path that I would like to have is that it allows me to work in almost any place and almost any category of work. For example, if I wanted to live in the mountains in a place where I could snowboard in the summer and dirt bike in the summer I could and I would be able to do that while also being able to do my work from home or work on the mountain in some way. All I know now is what I can do to help myself go towards that goal, I can learn to code better and I can apply to colleges that may lead to what I want to have in life but all I know now is that the future is a really interesting and scary thing that I have very little control over and I cant wait to see.

Image Credit: Vivente Australia

Application Deadline Is Closer Than It Appears

ojaipizzaLeave a comment

This month is the season for seniors to apply to college if they want to apply for Early Action (EA) or Early Decision (ED). In fact, I was planning to apply to Early action, but everything wasn’t going the way I want to be. My plan was to finish all the essays for every college one day before the deadline. The deadline is closer than it appears. I always thought I have time, so I do a little every day and sometimes I don’t even do it. Without a doubt, I couldn’t finish it and doesn’t have enough time to send it to my counselor and correct it. Two days left before the EA deadline! I just can’t believe how fast the deadline has shown up. I spent two nights burning the midnight oil, trying to finish it all. Of course, I still can’t finish the application, and I have to give up on EA for this time.

Yes, I took my lesson, I should be taking this seriously. Once it passes the deadline, there is no way back to regret it. I started to feel the “Real” stress from college applications. “College deadlines are no joke.” My college counselor always tells me that, and now I understand that it’s really not a joke.

Photo Credit: College Application Deadline

Ending a chapter

currychickenloveLeave a comment

Five more weeks. Only five more weeks and one of the biggest chapters of my life will come to an end. I came to America 3 years ago, planning on only staying for half a year. And now here I am, three years later. These have been the best three years of my life. I will miss this place more than I can explain. All the memories and people. It is hard leaving it behind. But I know that I will always be connected to this place and to the people. I know I will return, and I have made friendships for life here. 

Even though I am very sad to leave, I am also excited to see what the future will hold. I have so many plans and trips coming up that I can hardly wait for. I am taking a gap year in which I will be in a different country every month doing my wildlife photography. I am going on a 1-month backpacking trip in Montana and I have so many more plans, and then college. I couldn’t be happier with my college decision. I will be attending Montana State University. The location is absolutely beautiful, they have amazing programs, and their outdoor program is everything I was looking for in a college. The Yellowstone ecosystem is just 30 minutes away from campus and there are awesome ski resorts nearby.

I am incredibly sad to leave Highschool but I will never forget the people and memories I have made here. Thank you for the best three years of my life.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Montana_State_University

Evening Runs

mypetlobster11 Comment

Sundays are long runs.

I usually end up doing them in the evening much later than I should. I tell myself I’m being strategical and avoiding the heat, but if that was true I would run in the morning (that RARELY happens). In reality, my procrastination and dread for long runs are the reason why my long runs happen in the evening.

Yesterday though, my run was pleasant. I never thought I’d say these words, but it was almost enjoyable.

Around 7:55 I told myself, “Bella, get up, you’re running.” I grabbed my headphones, running watch, a headlamp, and started to run.

It was cool weather.

My music was good.

It was dark to the point where I could see my shoes and three feet ahead of me, but nothing else.

I had no light to see my watch screen, so I just ran. I didn’t constantly check to see my mileage or pace, or how much time I had left: I simply just ran.

And then there were the shadows.

What I’m going to say next will sound like some philosophical bs but while I was running it totally made sense, if you’re a runner, you know that the mind starts to lose sanity after about five miles.

The newly set sun and distant street lights served as an invitation for three shadows to join me. One ran about four feet behind me, one right by my side, and one ran far in front of me.

I stared at the three shadows for a good twenty minuets because, like I said, running is a tedious thing that causes a bit of insanity, and I started to think.

I thought about my progress with running, the struggles I’ve faced with it, where I am, and where I want to be.

The shadow behind me represented where I started: my first time running without someone forcing me to do it, the first time I competed in a race, and all of the first steps I took in my running journey.

The middle shadow right next to me represented where I am now: I am not in as great of shape as I was at my peak, but I’m in better shape that when I started. I am working to improve my skills.

The shadow in front of me represents where I want to be: my goals, the times I want to achieve, races I want to compete in, and mental toughness that I want to acquire with my running.

On my evening long run, in my philosophical state, I stared ahead and placed one foot in front of the other, in a rhythmical pattern, as I chased down my running goals and the shadow that ran ahead of me.

Photo via runningmagazine.ca