Tag: stress

The College Application Process

godgoldngloryLeave a comment

I feel like the system of college applications is so interesting. It’s crazy how much time, effort, money, and well-being people put into working towards the standard of what is considered a “solid” application. There are so many aspects of one’s application, too, that require so much of everything listed above. First, of course, are the grades. GPA, AP Test scores, and SAT/ACT scores are all big factors in how a student is portrayed academically, which I think is such a lame system. Basically, even if a student performs well in an in-class environment and puts in a bunch of effort in their homework and learning the material, ultimately, a lot of it depends on whether or not they are a good test taker. If not, because so many of the massive assessments of one’s grade are based on how well they perform on tests, a good student may seem on the outside to be one who barely puts in time and doesn’t care about their academic standing. Next is the college essay. I have heard too many horror stories about how the best writers come out with pretty awful essays that do not represent them well as writers or even as a person, just because of the stress the system puts one under to come out with such a magnificent piece of writing. On top of the grades and essays, you have all of the many extracurriculars. If you weren’t already burnt out trying to put in effort for school as well as lead a normal social life and give yourself time to rest, there are a million other things that “good and successful” students that want to get into a top-notch college should be doing with their time. Some of those include being in Student Council, a part of school programs such as Student Leadership or Dorm Prefects, participating in in-school programs such as Journalism or Yearbook, varsity or club sports, community service hours, and even holding a stable part-time job on top of it all. In my mind, it just seems like so much pressure to put on teenagers, half of them are not even sure what they want to do the rest of their lives. So now, they are putting in everything they have just to get accepted into the best university or college they possibly can. And the thing is, half of those top-notch places are not even worth the hype, at least in my opinion. So many people are striving to get in just because of the name or the reputation that barely holds any weight in the long run. I feel like I could talk about this process for actual hours, but it is something I am passionate about just considering it is such a big part of my and a lot of people’s lives around me.

College Applications: The Plight of Senior Year

PC: https://ovsjournalists.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/06d5f-file.jpg

Overwhelmed

uwucutiepatootieLeave a comment

Lately, I have been struggling with keeping up with my homework. I have been sick for the past week and focusing on school has been really hard for me. I took the past two days of school off and now I am even more behind. I have an essay, project, and test due next week, along with all of the homework I haven’t done from this week and I don’t even know what to do. I am missing even more school next week to go on a mandatory camping trip with my school and I’m going to fall even more behind. I still feel exhausted and not fully healthy and thinking about starting the hours and hours of homework I need to catch up on is horrifying. I have only missed a day and a half of school this whole school year until this week and I feel like because I’ve been sick, I have mentally missed a week of school even though in reality I have only missed two days. I hope that I feel better before my camping trip or else my week will get so much worse.

“Free stressful business woman working“/ CC0 1.0

Do grades matter

progstenLeave a comment

This is a question that I ask myself almost daily. Personally, I have been in an environment for most of my life that deems grades to be an important and necessary part of my life. I want to be successful in my life and future career. So, I have mostly believed that no matter what, as long as I get good grades, I will be fine in whatever is thrown at me in my life. However, I have never been able to get “good grades” from the school I go to standards. So, for a while, I believed that I was going to struggle in my life once I got to college and once I got into the “real world,” but I have started to change my views over these past few years. Is the reason I have started changing my views due to the fact that my grades never got up to what I see as good? There’s a chance of that, but mainly, it is because whenever I focus on school and grades, I see a trend in my overall life going in a downward trajectory, which is not the way you want it to go. I did some light research ( a Google search) and found that only half the people who get degrees were able to secure a full-time job in the field they studied, and 16 percent were unable to secure a job. The rest are all into somewhere in between either getting a part-time or switching fields fully cause they couldn’t find a job. So, back to the original question on hand: do grades matter? Well, I am going to say It depends. I know that this is the easy way out when it comes to the answer, but it all really depends on what you want to do. If I were to ask a doctor or someone aspiring to be one from their perspective, I’m sure grades impacted a large part of their life because it allowed them to pressure their passion, but if I were to ask this same question to someone who plans to do a trade, start their own business, become a pro athlete, or a job that doesn’t a full degree, then they might answer differently. Ultimately, this is about whoever is reading this perspective, and in my case, I’m the one reading, so I personally don’t believe in grades as I think it’s more important to enjoy life, and if the pursuit of grades is taken away from that, don’t pressure them.

I would be a duck

poofypuffyLeave a comment

If I could be any animal, I would be a duck.

First, ducks have small brains. I think it would be nice to just hang out in the water all day thinking about nothing but food. Actually not all day, like your whole life.

Secondly, ducks are cute.

Third: ducks can fly. I think it would be so nice to fly, so just be above everything and look at it from afar. Also, being high up is scary to me, to the point where it’s kind of exciting so I think flying would be cool.

Fourth of all, ducks are all-terrain. They can go in the air, land, or water. I think the water would be the best part, if not the sky. To just float in the cool water for your whole life would be so nice. No college applications. No class, no grades, no tests, no SATs. No worries, no stress, no hurt, no tears, no disgust, no listening to people cry and not being able to do anything about it. 

Fifth of all, ducks look very soft. I just want to pet one so bad, but they don’t sound like very good pets because they poop everywhere. A duck would probably be happier in the wild anyway. Also, I have a cat that would definitely attack the duck.

Photo by Prathap Karaka

A Sky Full of Stars

ojaipizzaLeave a comment

I have two other brothers, and they always did everything better than me; which I always feel so much pressure doing something with them. I always doubt my ability to do anything, like anything. I began the thought of I just can’t do it right. This year, I become a senior, ready for college. You have no idea how much pressure I have on myself. I don’t want to give up and go to random college, meantime, I still keep believing that there is a 1 percent possibility I can make something beautiful. A couple of weeks ago, Penn State needs a requirement of 120 scores for the English Language Proficiency. I spent my own money and took it almost twenty times, my highest score is 115 still couldn’t reach 120. Penn State can be an easy school that most everyone can get into. However, I’m still stuck in that dumb English test and couldn’t think of any way to improve it. Recently, most of the decisions came out, I got rejected by UIUC and LMU. I am not surprised at all because I know those types of good schools won’t accept me. Until this Tuesday, I got an email from Syracuse University. I just want to say, I think I’m dreaming right now. I got accepted! At that time, I told myself that I’m not that bad, not bad. Meanwhile, I’m so thankful that my brother and friends are there always supporting me. I just can’t believe it, really can’t. I can say I am really proud of myself, and I should love myself more.

Photo Credit: Stars

Escaping the pit of despair

navraj22Leave a comment
@benjimanz

“Ya sista doesn’t even have seasonal depression like this” @newyorknico @meals_by_cug #foryou #fypシ #impressions #duster

♬ Constellations – Duster
VC: Benjimanz//Tik Tok

Seasonal depression is wild. I’m not a depressed person, don’t really have reason to be depressed, and have never been depressed, but this winter I was feeling kinda sad I’m not even gonna front. Since the start of December, I had a fog hanging over me. I lost my drive to seek new relationships and became content with what I had, which was a good thing in some aspects, but I was incredibly unmotivated. I was bogged down by hours of college work, AP classes, soccer practices, and late nights during the school week. On the weekend, I would drive down to LA and it would feel like I had to choose between my family and friends when spending time with people. I was in the pit of despair.

All of the sudden, I have snapped out of it. I have moved past soccer, college apps, and have embraced senioritis. This has given me time to meditate during the school week and afforded me much more clarity. I have also started sleeping in LA on Sunday nights, which gives me more time to balance hanging with family and friends. Also, my convertible whose clutch I totally melted a month ago is back from the shop so I can take friends out in it. ALSO, I have a new friend who is the perfect candidate for a cruise in the Boxster.

Everything is coming up, Alden. I don’t know how things just magically turned around, but I’m here to ride out this wave of good energy.

Traveling Sucks the Life Out of Me

treefroggyLeave a comment

I’ve been traveling a lot recently, and it’s just reminded me how terrible traveling is for me. I really can’t ever travel healthily. It always ends up with me needing days to recover and feeling completely out of it both mentally and physically.

Mostly I hate flying on planes. The altitude really affects my ears, so I’m popping them for even weeks after I fly sometimes. Not even eating something or chewing gum helps. I have to be wearing the special pressurized earplugs and chewing gum to even feel somewhat okay when the plane takes off or lands.

Besides my ears hurting a ton, I get super swollen from flying. My fingers get too big for my rings to fit on them and my feet swell up so I have to loosen my shoeslaces a ton for them to fit into my shoes. Probably because I don’t drink enough water, but I lose my appetite and feel sick when I eat or drink anything when I fly, so I can’t really force myself to drink. Also, nobody likes going to the bathroom on planes. I avoid it if I can.

photo credit: tibco.com

When I get to my destination, I’m always so exhausted that I can barely even remember the events that happened when I look back on the memory. I get overwhelmed so easily when I travel that I’m on the edge of having a meltdown. It’s not super fun to go through a ton of pain just to forget why I was even there and only remember being agitated.

When I get back home, I need several business days to rest before I really feel like myself again. It takes a long time for my body to readjust to being home, but it takes my mind even longer. I have super realistic dreams every time I sleep, and when I’ve just traveled they’re even worse because I wake up and don’t even know where I am. It’s hard for the fact that I’m home to register in my brain, and I’m still in fight or flight mode from the new environments freaking me out, so I just end up in a terrible mental state for a week or two after traveling for even just two days.

Needless to say, I need a good few months of being strictly at home again. Honestly, that was one part of lockdown that I didn’t mind- I didn’t get to travel anywhere.

My Journal

pinkcube18Leave a comment

I realize I’ve forgotten about my daily planner. It’s been sitting in my desk for the past couple of weeks, leaving me to keep track of all my assignments in my head. Without it, academics have felt like one big game of whack-a-mole. I’ve been barely holding on, about to turn the lights out for the night before I realize an assignment is due tomorrow.

It can feel annoying writing every assignment down as its given. However, without an organized book to keep track of my assignments, I have felt like I’ve tuned out of academics.

Today I wrote down everything I needed to do. It’s not too much when you look at it on paper. When it’s all in your head, however, it can feel overwhelming. Just when you think you’ve cleared your agenda, another task appears. When I write down my assignments or meetings, however, I can accomplish things in a more mentally civilised way.

It is important for me to not let my own head be in charge of keeping track of things. Not everyone works the same way, but for me, writing down my responsibilities is the best way to get them done, and erasing them is very rewarding.

Image Credit:  LEUCHTTURM

Soul Knight

unicornowner1 Comment

Sometimes, it is good to waste some time on endless video games.

They can be a stress-free comfort zone, a place to escape far away from reality.

The game I’ve been playing recently is called “Soul knight.” it is a Run-and-Gun shooter game, and it allows multiple players under the same wifi connection to play together.

It takes up 10-30 minutes to finish one single game. Each game has 3 levels of the dungeon, each level has 5 small sub levels, and the deeper of the dungeon means more difficult to complete. By the end of each level, there is a boss which is a more powerful and aggressive monster you need to beat.

This is the game you have always wanted in your subconscious. Explore the dungeon, collect crazy weapons, dodge bullets and shoot ‘em all up! Extremely easy and intuitive control; super smooth and enjoyable gameplay, mixed with rogue-like elements.

photo credit: levelwinner.com

Year III

mypetlobster1Leave a comment

This is my last year in high school where my grades need to be A’s, where my extra curricular activities matter. This is my last year where cramming in PSAT prep will benefit me, and the last year where SAT prep is a dreaded ritual.

After this year, the hours on hours of work, sleepless nights,  cramming for texts, student leadership applications, struggles I faced, fun memories I had, volunteer activities, extra curriculars, and sports achievements will all be put on to a single document… The last three years of my life will be put on a document; an application.

By the end of this year I’m supposed to have a general idea of my life plan, my career, and my identity.

By the end of the year I’m supposed to have perfect SAT scores, ACT scores, and 5’s on AP tests.

By the end of the year I’m supposed to be a person who will stand out amongst millions of other applicants.

This is my last year to become who colleges want me to be while still trying to stay true to the person I want to be.

In less than 365 days, I will need a paper explaining who I am, what I want to do, what I stand for, what sets me apart, and why I belong at the college receiving the paper. All of who I am, all of why I’m special, and all of why I belong in 650 words.

A transcript and 650 words which will determine my future, career and where I will be for the next four to eight years.

A lot to think about… a lot to do, a lot at stake. Welcome to junior year.

Photo Credit: artsy.net