The Worst Math Problem Yet

Never in my life would I have thought that a teacher could affect me so deeply. I’m not supposed to care that much, I’m supposed to feel more or less indifferent about my teachers, after all, they’re teachers, not my friends.

But today’s news stabbed me in the chest. I know I only have little less than a semester left at this school anyway, but I really hoped he would be here for that.

See, I hate math. And when I say hate, I mean I absolutely despise it. Ever since I was in fifth grade, I’ve been told that I’m bad at it. That’s not necessarily true; I’m not terrible, I just need some more time than others. None of my teachers ever gave me a chance to figure that out. Until last year, when I realized that I can do math, even if I’m not good at it. It sounds like such a small thing, but it made my days at school so much easier.

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Last week, we had a test in math and our teacher told us to write something nice about him for extra credit. I said that, if it wasn’t for him, I would have never even considered taking an AP math class, never in a million years. But here I am, passing the first semester with an A-. I said that I actually feel sort of confident about doing well on the AP test. But now I don’t know, I’m honestly scared.

Even if our new teacher will be great, amazing, perfect, anyone has ever wanted in a math teacher, it won’t be the same. I won’t be excited going into class anymore. I really shouldn’t be going into this with such expectations and I shouldn’t be so dramatic about this. But I am, that’s how I feel, and it makes me so sad.

It’s weird, this really shouldn’t be so important to me. But it is, I care a lot, maybe too much, but I care a lot.

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Math.

Actually I am not a great math student, and math is not my favorite subject to study. I mean math is gonna be very useful in our future careers, but what I don’t like about math is that math is just confusing sometimes and I hate the feeling when all of those numbers are stuck in my head.

Tests have to be performed in education, I totally understand that and I’ve been taking so many tests as I grow up so I dont have any problems about tests or I should say students just have to take tests.

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F.I.N.A.L.S.

It is that dreaded time of year again, finals. 

After a full semester of work all I have to show for it is a bunch of pieces of crumpled papers in the bottom of my backpack and the ink my teacher puts on my test telling me how I did in their class this semester.

This time is stressful for all, and I try to not get caught up in the stress, but there is just no way around it.

Honestly, most finals for me aren’t too hard.

Math? Easy.

Science? Easy.

English? Easy

History? No sir.

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I HATE THE SAT!

Yesterday was the big huzzah. It was the day that would determine the fate of my summer. Yesterday, Thursday, March 31st, 2011, was the day I had been waiting for. And it was nothing short of disappointing.

I was home sick yesterday, but I still remembered, the moment I woke up from my slumber, to check my SAT scores. It only made my condition worse.

The screen read 650-reading, 670-math, and 620-writing. Goodness, it seemed as if my previous summer had been a waste. I had spent two months of pure studying for this one test and I had gotten a 1940. The colleges that I am hoping to get into require over a 2000.

I did remind myself, however, that I was sick that Saturday I took the test and the week following up to it. But a 1940? That is no exception.

I haven’t told my mom my score yet because I am afraid for her reaction. This summer, before taking my first SAT prep class, my diagnostic grade had been in the low 1900’s. My mom was very disappointed in me and I know that she will still be disappointed in my score if I tell her that after two months of sending me to classes, I have arrived at a almost identical score.

My goal for the SAT’s is a 2100. A 700 in critical reading, a 700 in math, and a 700 in writing. I know this is attainable because my scores (650, 670, 620) are not too far from my goal. But sadly, I will have to spend my summer not at the beach and having fun, but in a cold, isolated classroom, shoving hundreds of vocabulary words into my head in SAT classes. Oh goody, I just CAN’T WAIT!