When I Grow Up, I…

Life is an expensive sports car on the Autobahn. We are often caught up in the thrill of living, that adrenaline pumping feeling of exhilaration, that we often forget where we are going, or why we are where we are in the first place. Everything is just a blur. Colors, sounds, people all mesh into one, giant miasma of lights and din.

For these reasons, people sometimes forget what their aspirations are in life or where they want to be in 10-15 years. But sometimes people don’t spend enough time figuring out what they want. Sometimes people don’t know what they want and are stumbling along, playing life by ear.

I know what I want. Or at least I think I do.

When I grow up, I want to be an anesthesiologist at a well known hospital, helping save countless lives of people that won’t remember my name in a month and whose faces I will forget in a few days. I want to have a Cal Tech diploma under my name and have graduated with stellar grades.

When I grow up, I want to own a house in Northern California (preferably near San Francisco), up where the air is crisp with the hint of ocean air or in a clean beach in Southern California (so that would mean Santa Monica is out of the picture). My dream house would either be inspired by contemporary, sleek modern designs or by warm Spanish decor. The house would be complete with a beautiful kitchen, bathroom, master bedroom, and a roomy walk-in closet. The floors would be bamboo for environmentally friendly reasons and the view would have to include the beautiful ocean. The house must be big enough for 4 people but most importantly, it must be away from the noise of the city for privacy but close enough to a city for convenience.

When I grow up, I want to be able to have been to Europe and eat the foods that aren’t tainted by an American’s hands. I want to see the ruins and see the masterpieces. I want to open my eyes to the slums and I want to experience the most lavish. I want to be more worldly and broaden my horizons. I want to get away from what I know, and throw myself in the midst of a foreign labyrinth and discover my path as I go.

When I grow up, I want to have children. I want to be a mother. I want to give them life and a stable family. I want to be at their first soccer game and their play performances. I want to scold them for doing wrong things and I want to encourage them for doing the right. I want to lead them in the right direction, show them that life isn’t all about money, fame, power, and sex (as many think it is about nowadays). I want to give them what I didn’t have as a child-to compensate for and reconcile with my past by building their future. I want a husband who will love me for a lifetime, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, to share the good times and the bad.

When I grow up, I want to be happy with where I am. I want my regrets to be menial in comparison to the victories and achievements in my life. I want my life to be a Range Rover or a BMW 335i hard top convertible cruising down the PCH, so living won’t be such a blur.

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