happy birthday

I wish I could say it to you, but we are on a strictly no communication basis.

The only thing we share now is our existence and hatred towards each other.

It’s sad… my greatest love turned into my strongest hate.

happy birthday, you’re an adult now.

I hope you move far far away and buy a house of your own thousands of miles away from here,

but I hope you’ll be happy.

I still wear the necklace you got me for my birthday. People tell me I should get rid of it, and I probably should, but I can’t because its the last piece of you I have left, and, as much as I want to, I can’t bring myself to let you go.

I want you gone but I want you happy,

I want you to feel awful for what you did, but I want you to come back to me.

I want to hate you, but I want you to love me…

because I love you still.

So happy birthday, thank you for the memories, the laughs, the smiles, and thank you for the love we shared.

I hope one day it will overcome the hatred we share.

Photo credit:

Another List

Usually when I don’t know what to write about, I make some sort of list of things that make me happy, things that calm me down, things that remind me of home. But it seems like I’ve run out of ideas for positive lists like that, so here’s a list of things I hate:

  1. trash in nature
  2. when people are rude to the cashier
  3. math
  4. losing
  5. watching cocky people win
  6. watching pretty much anyone other than my team win
  7. public speaking
  8. not having any socks left
  9. being left on read
  10. artichokes
  11. being disliked
  12. feeling like you have to sneeze but not being able to sneeze
  13. racists
  14. ignorant people
  15. my bad communication skills
  16. Photo Credit:


  17. blisters
  18. nightmares
  19. bad actors
  20. feeling left out
  21. walking on the street alone at night
  22. clowns
  23. loneliness
  24. self doubt
  25. jet lag
  26. assigned seating
  27. OVS wifi
  28. jacob sartorius
  29. fun killers
  30. heights
  31. not being respected
  32. swarms of insects
  33. overcooked pasta
  34. people in mascot costumes
  35. dress code
  36. overpriced clothes
  37. snoring
  38. loud chewing
  39. plastic straws
  40. running out of time

two love poems

It’s Inevitable, Isn’t It?

It’s inevitable, isn’t it?

The loneliness we all know

Too well to ignore.

Loneliness is a shadow

That follows the lovely moments,

The beautiful moments, the love.

We know both sides,

We know dark yields light,

But, just like that, we know love might

Be temporary just as all other things.

Temporary in the way it sings;

Temporary with its whizzing wings;

Temporary, because we know what wins.

What wins is not light, or day, or love,

Or night or dark, or loneliness.

What wins is the cycle

Of all we know,

All we love,

All we despise.



It still hurts, believe me.

You left me half a year ago,

You broke me then, you know?

I tried to hold you back,

Have you back, the way we were.

You didn’t.

You didn’t want that, you didn’t want me,

Didn’t want me in your life,

In your heart, in your camera roll, in your mind.

And see what you did?

See what I did?

I lost the mask I had put on your face all this time.

I began hating to hear your name all around,

I forgot how I ever loved you.

That’s the funny thing about love.

You never think it ends

When you’re its guest.

You think it will last forever and go on and go on and


Go, go and leave me and don’t remind me

Of what you gave me and took away,

What you promised and didn’t keep,

What you told me and meant with all your heart,

But what does that matter, if your heart has changed?

It still hurts, believe me.

Cutting you out of my memories,

Ignoring birthdays and anniversaries,

Seeing her.

But that’s the funny thing about love:

We are so willing to fall in love and fall on our hearts,

And we think it will go on and go on and


Handing Your Heart Away

Everyone has a heart. The heart is a clump of muscle imbedded inside your chest, hidden behind your lungs and ribcage. Upon first glance, upon first experience, you plunge your hand into your chest and enclose your fist around your heart.

You’ll keep your hand enclosed around that heart. Maybe you will release your heart, sew up your chest, then wash the blood off your hands.

Or maybe something will happen, and you begin to pull your heart out of your chest. Strangely enough, it doesn’t hurt. Just don’t pull too hard or too fast, you could bleed yourself to death. No, pull slow, allow time to clot, then keep pulling.

Who knows how long it takes until you can hold your heart at arm’s length? Maybe it takes two years. Two years sounds like a good amount of time.

Your heart is enclosed in your hand, pumping, pumping, slightly connected to your chest and the rest of your body. You look up. There it is. There is the thing, the person, the place, the reason you pulled your heart out in the first place. Blood soaks your footsteps so you’ll always know the way you came.

You have two options.

The first option is to cut your heart away from you body. Hand it to that person, place it on the ground, do anything that shows that your heart is no longer your own.

They could crush it. Stomp on it, squeeze it slice and dice it up. They could do anything at all and you could do nothing about it. It is no longer your heart.

You have another option.

Turn away. Put your heart back into your chest. Stack your ribs on top and peel your lungs back into place. Sew yourself up. The heart is yours. It will stay yours. Do not ever let it go again.

What Tim Tebow and the GOP Candidates Have in Common

The reason I first made this connection is because I hate both of them. Let me start out explaining why I hate Tebow because I think people know why I hate the GOP Candidates.

Tim Tebow is a great athlete, there is no hiding from that. And like many athletes, Tim Tebow is religious. But what makes Tebow stand out is his proselytizing that he constantly does.

From his Super Bowl anti-abortion commercial to his constant kneeling, Tebow makes it his goal for everyone to know that he loves God.  It is so obnoxious for him to constantly thank God and Jesus for his successes. He can thank them in his head, he doesn’t need to say it out loud.

Yes, I am both an atheist and a liberal so I am predisposed to dislike these characters. But there are many Christians who hate Tebow and just as many republicans that can’t stand their candidates.

So what do these two have in common besides me hating them? They both are putting on a show.

I’m sure Tebow loves god but he wants the attention for his devotion. The GOP candidates (mainly Romney) are making it seem like they have beliefs far more radical than in actuality, just to gain votes.

Now I realize that in our society we have a tendency to act differently to impress others, it’s part of our nature.

But it is stupid that so many people fall for the obvious ploys of these actors. I guess the reason I hate both of them is because they make me realize how ignorant many of my fellow Americans are.

It disgusts me that so many people listen to words without thinking about the meaning behind them. TIM TEBOW WANTS TO CONVERT YOU! THAT IS HIS GOAL! THE GOP WANTS YOUR VOTES!

Do not believe they are good and righteous people just because they tell you they are. Listen to me, I am the Pope. See what I did there? (I’m not the Pope).

Stop being gullible and ignorant. Stop living up to the stereotypes that the rest of the world make about us. Be smart.

Nobody Likes Nicholas Cage

At least no one that I’ve ever met does.

Recently a video of Cage arguing with his wife has unveiled and apparently he’s been arrested.

The article states that Cage was arrested while arguing with his wife, extremely intoxicated, and pretty mush having a hissy fit.

In all honesty Nicholas Cage isn’t even a good actor and seems to ruin every movie that he’s in. He’s been around of ages and has only been nominated for a few awards and has hardly actually won any. I don’t understand why the keep asking him to be in movies! It’s ridiculous.

I mean just look at him freak out.

In all honesty that doesn’t look like good acting to me. It does look pretty embarrassing though. He kind of looks like a wet cat. Not to mention every time he comes out on the screen or starts going on one of his emotional rants, my friends and I can’t help but hold in out laughter.

I’m sorry if you do actually like Nicholas Cage, but I am definitely not a fan.