Recognition: Happy Mother’s Day

In the United States, we have so many holidays honoring certain people and certain things. But we often fail to recognize those who aren’t in the picture, or who fall outside of conventional situations.

Happy Mother’s Day to those who lost their mothers, or never even knew them. Or maybe it’s not a happy Mother’s Day. We fail to acknowledge the people for whom Mother’s Day is a hard day – the people who never got to know their mother, or who had abusive mothers and don’t want to celebrate.

Happy Mother’s Day to the moms who aren’t alive for this year’s celebration, and to the mothers whose children died before their time. Let’s celebrate the women who tried and tried and couldn’t have children, and guardians who may not have kids of their own but fill the role of mothers, taking care of kids as if they were theirs.

Happy Mother’s Day to those without mothers or kids, and to those who have a hard time on this holiday. Happy Mother’s Day to the people who have no one to celebrate, or no one to celebrate with.

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The Dinner Guest Bears Revelation

Recently an old friend came to dinner. As she talked about her life I came to this realization: life, no matter where you are in it, is hard.

Whether you are older and wiser or young and reckless, people are hard to love, friends are hard to keep, biting back retorts a challenge.

There’s always a road block, always a speed bump. Money, love, distance, self esteem, everything is a crossroad.

I’ve also realized that there will always be people telling me, “Yeah well think about all those other people suffering, by comparison you’re living easy.” I am one of those people telling others this. I am a person telling myself this. Yet that doesn’t take the sting off of living.

People telling you to stop complaining is much like rubbing salt in a wound, but then again this world complains so incredibly much. I have a family of wasps living in my head constantly reminding me of my complaints, all the negatives I see in the world and others.

Admittedly I am probably more judgmental than I ought to be, maybe a little too cynical, a little too sarcastic, a little too snarky, a little too mocking. Still it’s hard, to be around people who constantly complain, only see issue and always seem to have an issue, or relate everything back to them.

And the worst part is that person is me. Or am I brave enough to step out into the world and proclaim that I am any different than the person standing next to me? That somehow I have defied human nature while they haven’t?

No I am not, because I am not different. The person next to me is having the exact same thoughts, “I am different aren’t I, I can do what I want, because something I can’t quite put my finger on makes me better than the person standing next to me.”

It’s the human survival drive and by extension competitiveness.  It’s the need to outlast everyone else, it’s the dopamine release you get when you’re right.

I am no different, life is a crossroad.

I am constantly at a roadblock, a crossroads and I for the life of me can’t figure out how to handle it with grace.

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She was young and he was old.

She said stop and he said go.

But she wouldn’t say no.

And this was her flaw.

She put up walls,

but they were made of straw, not brick.

And he could knock them down with one breath.

She tried to fight,

but her specialty was ballet, not Taekwondo.

She wasn’t strong enough

to say no.

She tried to kick and tried to fight

She tried to scream but found no air.

She was suffocating,

enveloped in a sheet from which there was no escape.

She was tied down,

unable to break free,

struggling against the ropes that bound her.

She thought she was strong,

that she had her own voice and could fend for herself.

She thought she was powerful and in control.

But she wasn’t strong enough to say no.

But from her bindings

she kicked and flailed and struggled

and broke free.

She took a breath,

free at last

and finally

she could say no.

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The Year Everyone Was Offended By Everythi

As I grow older, I continue to notice more about those around me. This year, I have taken particular attention to the issues with body image and gender debates and have noticed that in every aspect of these subjects, people seem to become greatly offended.

Having a “positive body image” is all about loving yourself no matter how much you weigh or what jean size you wear, yet people on both sides of the spectrum are constantly critiquing each other.

Words like “fat” and “anorexic” and “overweight” have become sensitive, and it no longer matters if you are skinny, overweight, chubby, or just average; you WILL be criticized for your weight. The irony in this is everyone is preaching having a positive body image, when in reality, we continue to criticize those who are not of an ideal weight.

Secondly, the gender debates. Recently, two UCLA women publicized their opinions on gender neutral bathrooms stating “Transgenderism is a mental disorder”, “get your agenda out of my bathroom”, and “there are only two genders”. While many may agree or disagree, these are their opinions, and they are entitled to share them.

The issue here is that no matter what, people will always have different opinions, the issue at hand is to cease the mass amounts of sensitivity towards these subjects. Understandably, people have strong opinions on these subjects, but this is not a reason to push personal opinions onto everyone around us.

Just my opinion.