I’ve recently come back to a certain state of mind.
It wasn’t a choice and nothing or no one triggered it.
I disconnect from the world completely without even realizing.
I leave my body, my brain as if watching over myself like a spirit.
Unaware if this is a past life or really just my reality.
Looking down to my hands lying limply on my lap unaware that they’re even mine.
It hits me I exist. I am here and alive.
I go through life numb, forgetting all that I’ve accomplished.
Coming home just to forget every conversation I had that day.
It seems as if theres an intruder taking charge of my every move.
To then steal my memories, leaving none for me.
My eyes glazed over staring off into a false reality.
Blinking, recalling none of this is a dream.
I am breathing, living human being who feels nothing.
Unaware if I’ll ever get to meet this person taking shelter in my own skin.
I’m unwillingly dissociated, but aspire to feel anything.