beyond words, feelings, and emotions.
i feel the whole world watching my next move but every step i take is somehow five steps backward.
i know that if i tell someone it would help me so much, but if i tell someone it will hurt the person i care about most.
this person means so much to me and i don’t want to hurt them in any manner.
but the weight of what they don’t know is closing in on me and it may kill me before they realize.
i can’t allow them to continue because i know that by the end they will be hurt worse than before.
my heart races when it’s brought up and tears grow in my eyes.
i could cry for hours and hours but still no one would notice.
and who could i tell?
i can’t confide in them because it’ll hurt me too much and i can’t confide in anyone else, it’ll just hurt them.
i’m so scared for them, because when the truth is released it will slowly break them, until they are nothing and i am nothing.
if i tell them, i will break as well, they will lose their trust in me just like i have lost it in myself.
how have i gone on this long without breaking is beyond my understanding?
but now i am breaking.
and no one seems to notice.
i’ll be gone and everyone will continue on.