When it Hits…

P.G.P. something also known as the Pre Game Poop.

If you’re a real athlete, then you’ve definitely had a run in with this situation once or twice.

For those of you who don’t know (the non-athletes), the P.G.P. is no joking matter.

It doesn’t happen during just one certain sport, it is all, it doesn’t affect just one type of athlete, it is all. The athletes who experience this range from inexperienced high school athletes to professional athletes.

It is a stomach-wrenching sensation that plagues many athletes right before they set out for competition. It can hit at anytime, but the most common time for it to set in is about five minutes before starting something that won’t allow any stopping to use the bathroom. This sensation will hit and you will make a mad dash for the bathroom at the last minute. However, once you actually get through the long line (due to other people that are experiencing P.G.P) you realize that you actually don’t have to go to the bathroom and it is really just your nerves acting up.

Photo Credit: http://4.bp.blogspot.com

 

My Favorite Street Style Stars

On Instagram there is a flurry of planned, blurry outfit photos with #ootd or pictures of one’s 15 bazillion Cartier Love Bracelets. But, my favorite fashion photos are the ones captured on the move, encompassing one’s street style (hence the title). So, let’s jump in.

Miroslava Duma

Photo Credit: Pop Sugar

This woman has some of the best street style looks I have ever seen. She maintains a formal look while still able to pull it off in the most casual of circumstances.

Olivia Palermo

Photo Credit: Daily Mail

10/10, Palermo consistently hits it out of the ball park with her looks, without even trying. Her style is a modernized classic, and is able to integrate trends into her look while still staying true to her personal style.

Emmanuelle Alt

Photo Credit: vanessataaffe.wordpress.com

Editor-in- Chief of Vogue Paris, Emmanuelle Alt has the classic, killer french style I love. Classic and simplistic, but never boring, Emmanuelle Alt always has awe-worthy looks.

Amal Clooney (né Alamuddin)

Photo Credit: demureonline.com

Amal Clooney, British lawyer and, yes, you guessed it,George Clooney’s Wife, has a complex, yet not too trendy style. She maintains a perfect balance, and always looks professional.

Miranda Kerr

Photo Credit: http://www.fashionmg-style.com

Miranda Kerr’s style has been on my fashion radar since I was 11 years old. Thats a pretty long time to love a person’s style, considering it is ever-changing. Miranda is able to maintain a classic look (see a pattern in these celeb’s style?) while still having fun with her outfits.

Starbucks Satanic Red Cups

Some are calling it Cupgate 2015. Others are calling it stupid

Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year but some are saying that Starbucks thinks otherwise

This past week or so there has been quite a few arguments over Starbucks’ new holiday cups and there is outrage. Instead of having the snowmen, reindeer or all those Biblically correct Christmas symbols, they have gone for red. Cue maniacal devil laugh.

photo credit: starbucks.com

I for one, like so many others in the population do not care…at all. I don’t understand why it matters if I drink a delicious holiday drink out of a plain red cup or a cup with Santa’s sleigh on it.

Also, its called the holiday season for a reason. There are other holidays beside Christmas. I know its crazy to think. These holidays have been neglected by many, so I for one think it’s a good idea to have a holiday neutral cup if we are looking on the bright side of things.

So put out your torches or use them to heat your holiday drinks and just enjoy the most wonderful time of the year.

Doctor Talib

The Broncos defense was extra aggressive last Sunday when they visited the Indianapolis Colts.

It’s safe to say that the Broncos defense is the best in the NFL and their secondary prides themselves as a “no fly zone.” However, the Andrew Luck led offense of the Colts easily picked apart the Broncos defense and this angered many defensive players.

Picture Credit: “extras.mnginteractive.com”

Frustrated about his team’s performance, Aqib Talib, a corner of the Denver Broncos, took to unorthodox methods of playing defense. On one of the last plays of the game, Colts tight end Dwayne Allen and Von Miller were jawing when Aqib ran up and stuck his fingers in Allen’s helmet and purposely poked Allen’s eye.

Picture Credit: “localtvkdvr.files.wordpress.com”

Talib has been suspended by the NFL for one game. He was suspended ONE game for trying to gouge another player’s eyes out. Talib definitely should be suspended more than one game.

Oh, and someone had the great idea of changing Talib’s position from cornerback to optometrist.

Picture Credit: “dailysnark.com”

 

Writers

See here’s the thing, there are people everywhere in the world fighting for a change, for a difference, fighting to save humanity. And that’s all well and good, but then there are writers.

A specialized breed of ruin, a deadly addictive drug.

Sure one could ask what the cuss they do for the world. I can tell you this, they kill trees. They bury students in dry immobile states of constant stress and depression.

But know what else they can do? They can keep me up all night. Make it so my mind never stops whispering to me. Make it so it feels like I’m drowning in ink and can never shut out that click click clicking of the keyboard.

Writers. Arguably the most talented, frustrating, simultaneously strangle-worthy yet kiss-worthy people on the planet.

Every time I finish a book good or bad I wonder how?

How on earth does anyone figure this out? How does anyone think of this? How does this happen? How are they real? How do they do this? How? How? How?

Then I think why.

Why can’t I do this? Why am I not doing this? Why am I not good enough? Why isn’t this happening? Why? Why? Why?

It’s a constant cycle: how, why, how, why, how, why? Like a broken record playing over and over and over.

I’ve read most of my life away and yet I still can’t see those plot holes coming, I can’t predict it, yes that’s a good thing. But then I can’t even seem to think of ones coming at me on my own how am I supposed to write anything that even measures up in the slightest.

Sure good artists steal but that only gets you so far. So what if some people tell you you’re good, their obligated to tell you that, cause the worlds about making people feel good about themselves, especially when you’re a young volatile developing teen yeah?

But then I see other people’s writing, it doesn’t even need to be published or personal-universe shattering. And it starts it all over again.

Photo Credit: http://www.darkgovernment.com/

How? Why? How? Why? How? Why? Until it feels like I’m going to go mad.

I’m thinking yeah I’m good enough but then I read a bone shaking book. And the little disembodied voice whispers, are you good enough? Am I good enough? It echoes, like a museum display no one came to see.

Then I’ll read something written by someone like me unofficial, young, and just writing for the sake of writing. And that disembodied voice gets louder, No you’re not good enough are you? Just one lousy kid playing pretend.

I recently finished a book that for some reason shook me to my foundation. I hate analyzing literature but this one hit points that are incredible and leave me knee deep in cement thinking, this proves it, it officially proves it, writers are amazing and will probably be the fryers of my emotions. Yes the book had some stand out flaws but still. How?

I’m one sad little mind grasping at something I’m not even sure is mine to grab. One out of hundreds thousands millions. Every time I’m done with a book or story I’m left raw and wrathful and insecure yet I continue to do it to myself because I don’t think I could bare to be without it.

Happy

What I fail to do in my day-to-day life is take things less seriously.

I always think about the future and whether the guy I have a crush on will ever reciprocate my feelings or whether I’ll ever amount to anything.

These things—these vague dreams and thoughts of mine cause my stomach to churn and my eyes to fill with tears.

I want to live life for now, not waste my thoughts on the future. For who knows whether I’ll even be alive for the moments I dream about.

When I was younger I would see people in commercials, with their perfect BMI and perfectly white teeth, and I couldn’t help but think, why not me?

Why am I not happy or perfect everyday of the year? Why am I not constantly dressed in designer knock offs from Macy’s?

The truth is, these people are just actors who are paid to be happy, and they’re probably not paid too much either. I mean it’s a JC Penney commercial. 

If you were happy everyday of your life you wouldn’t be a person, you’d be a game show host. 

I try to live my life with as much hope as possible.

While on the outside I seem like this moody teenager who thrives off sarcasm and the misfortune of others, I really do care.

 I love to laugh and I love to make people laugh.  I love sunshine and 80’s power ballads. I love animals and strong coffee. I love my family and friends. 

I want to live my life happy.   I don’t care if I’m never rich or famous or the star of a TJ Maxx commercial, I just want to be the happiest person I can be. 

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credit to tumblr

Talentless Trump

Photo Credit: http://www.cnn.com

Watching the race for president this year has been painful. We have two especially… interesting candidates; Dr. Ben Carson, an extremely close-minded neurosurgeon, and Donald Trump, the crazy businessman.

Dr. Carson… where do I start?

His opinionated mentality continues to remain one sided as he plows through in the race. He has openly expressed his opinions on some of the most popular topics at the moment, which includes transgender and gay rights.

In reply to the suggestion that transgender men and women should be able to use the bathroom of their new sex, Dr. Carson said, “It is not fair for them to make everyone else uncomfortable,” which, as I would imagine, is frustrating to transgender men and women everywhere.

He suggested that there be a separate bathroom made for transgender people.

Yet again, history repeats itself.

The second candidate of the terrible two is Donald Trump.

I could write for hours about how ignorant he truly is, but instead I shall focus on the most recent issue he has struck the U.S. with: Starbucks cups.

Yes, Starbucks coffee cups.

In Trump’s opinion, Starbucks coffee cups should say “Merry Christmas” rather than “Happy Holidays.”

What?

Is there only one holiday celebrated this winter? Nope, there are three major holidays celebrated in the U.S during the winter holidays; Kwanza, Christmas, and Hanukkah, NOT JUST CHRISTMAS.

Although my family celebrates Christmas, as I am assuming Trump’s does too, it is ridiculous to insist that there be one of these three holidays publicized by companies.

I am disappointed in how narrow-minded both of these Republican candidates are.

Good luck America!

South Park is the Future

South Park is possibly the single most offensive and insensitive show on Earth. The show also has a knack of predicting the future.

Picture Credit: “www.hulu.com”

South Park was created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone and revolves around four boys – Eric Cartman, Kenny McCormick, Stan Marsh, and Kyle Broflovski as they embark on numerous bizarre adventures in a small town in Colorado. The animated comedy satirizes and portrays sensitive topics in the most crude manner possible.

Somehow during the story making process the producers of the show manage to predict the future.

In episode two of the twelfth season (aired March 19, 2008) the boys are involved in the sacrifice of Britney Spears in order to better the corn harvest. The episode chooses Britney Spears’ downward spiral for its entire story. At the end, once they have killed Britney there is a broadcast that determines the next target. The target presented was a then 15 year old Miley Cyrus. How we wish South Park did not predict this one.

Picture Credit: “vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net”

In episode one of the sixth season (aired March 6 2002). Jared is giving a speech about how eating Subway has helped him lose weight. The four boys go to talk to him and convince him to tell the truth that Subway doesn’t help him lose weight, that he has aides that help him stay in shape. Jared announces that he has aides but the townspeople mistook it for the disease AIDS. Obviously they did not take this news well and Jared lost his job. He then comes up with idea that will regain his popularity, he creates the “Aides for Everyone” campaign and announces he wants to give every kid aides. The townspeople again mistake him for wanting to transmit the STI to their children.

This is no coincidence or luck, South Park can predict the future people.

My Apologies to Librarians

I don’t enjoy reading books.

I don’t like sitting starring at a delicate browning page reading words that always get lost in my head

photo credit: athome.readinghorizons.com

Now, I know I have probably offended more than 75% of the populations, and if my English teacher is reading this than you are probably deeply saddened by my epiphany.

I don’t exactly know why I don’t like reading books

Maybe its because when I do read its for all the wrong reasons. I never read for fun, I read because of an assignment.

Maybe it dates back to when I was first learning how to read. There was a lot of throwing, and crying and screaming. All around it was a traumatizing experiencing for everyone involved especially me.

Now don’t get me wrong, I take a dive into the world of books every now and again. When a book catches my eye I look on audible and get listening, but somehow reading a jumble of letters on a page coming together to create a story doesn’t tickle my fancy.

Now this being said I don’t think that reading is evil. If you enjoy it all the more power to you, but please when I say that I don’t like it, don’t look at me like that, you know exactly what look I’m talking about.

Novemb…Christmas!

People. It is the beginning of November.

This past Saturday, November 7th, I was walking past a coffee shop when I heard a man say, “Merry Christmas”. I was in disbelief – Thanksgiving hasn’t even happened yet, are we already in the period of Santa hats and Christmas music?

What was even weirder was how the other member of the conversation responded. There was no mention of the fact that it is almost two months until the ever-popular Christmas itself, or that we still haven’t celebrated Thanksgiving.

With a month left until Turkey Day, and Halloween right behind us, we are already diving straight into the Christmas celebration. Already, it is near impossible to walk into a store without hearing Mariah Carey blasting for the hundredth time.

Now I’m all for celebrating the holidays – it’s a joyful time, so why not cherish it? But I don’t understand the urgency, the need to skip over holidays just to begin celebrating Christmas as soon as possible.

In the seasonal isle of any given store, there are going to be a few Thanksgiving decorations, sure. But the majority of that isle is going to be chock full of blow up reindeer and twinkle lights. And that’s fine, except for the fact that it’s not Christmas season yet!

It’s November. It’s not even Thanksgiving. You guys are ridiculous.

Photo Credit: sammyadebiyi.com